


Dreams and Nightmares

by Yonkyu



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blow Jobs, Bottom Dean, Creature Fic, Dreams and Nightmares, First Time, M/M, Physical Abuse, Pre-Series, Top John, Top Sam, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 12:04:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 32,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4221084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yonkyu/pseuds/Yonkyu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Winchester’s are on a hunt at the beginning of the summer. They are headed to Salem, Mass, I place full of supernatural connections. Sam has these dreams of pure ecstasy. John has dreams full of regret. Dean pushes forward on the hunt to discover what this creature is all about. Without realization, John makes a mistake and could become a victim for this creature. These dreams rattle John and Sam. They don’t know what to do and they turn towards Dean for help that they can’t really explain. Will they stop the creature in time or will John and Sam fall and become the next victims?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Notes at the end.

**** ** **

**** Chapter One ** **

**Sam’s POV**  
  
It’s a hot and humid summer day, and Sam relaxes against a large oak tree while watching his father and brother spar in the open dirt of the meadow. He observes how Dean uses his arms for blocking punches and kicks. Dean swings his arms across his body, blocking his father’s incoming punch. He would side-step out of the way to use his forearms in a downward motion to block a punch or cross his arms together in an X-block against a powerful kick.   
  
  
Sam grins wide when Dean strikes his father with a strong front kick to his solar plexus that lands him on his ass with the wind knocked out of him.  
  
  
Sam does his best to cover the chuckle that escapes him at the look on his father’s face, pure shock, impressed until it turns to anger.   
  
  
“Enough of this! Dean! Four laps around the field and 100 pushups” John side glances to look at Sam before he continues, “Sam! You will hold his ankles off the ground in the wheelbarrow hold while he does his reps.”  
  
  
John stands up while he brushes the dirt off his body, pinches his lips together, shakes his head, and curses under his breath.   
  
  
Dean stands there, mouth hanging wide open as if to say something, but thinks better of it.  
  
  
John barks out his order, “Now, Dean!”  
  
  
John turns on his heels and heads towards his truck. Getting in it and leaving for the motel.  
  
  
Sam breathes in to look up at his brother, all he can hear is the swishing of the long grass as Dean runs through the field. Dean always does as he is told, but never once does he receive praise or positive feedback for doing a deed well.  
  
  
Sam gazes at Dean while he runs through the hot open terrain. His brother is getting stronger, the more sparring matches he has with their Dad, and Sam wonders if he will be able to hold his own against his brother. They are the same height now, and it pisses Dean off more than he can say. Though the more he thought, the more he realized they were  _not_  the same height. He is taller than Dean by at least 3 or 4 inches.  
  
  
The swishing sounds stop and the book he was pretending to read is knocked out of his hands. Sam frowns as it hits the ground.   
  
  
“Come on Sam. I want to get these pushups over with. Let’s go.”  
  
  
Dean leans over and places his palms in the dirt holding his upper body off the ground with his feet shoulder width apart.  
  
  
Sam sighs and pushes up onto his feet. He grabs his brother’s ankles and grunts as he lifts Dean’s feet up into position. Dean begins the pushups ordered by their father.  
  
  
Dean sweats in the sun as if it’s his punishment, to himself, for knocking their father on his ass.   
  
  
Sam wouldn’t punish Dean. He is proud of his brother and to witness the strength and confidence Dean’s has built through the matches with their father. Though their father has nothing to say about it. At 21, Dean is an adult, but John still controls the situation and rules for both of them – and Dean lets him.   
  
  
Sam hears the shame in taking their father down in Dean’s voice as he counts. He knows that Dean was only sparring, but a part of him wants to know if it was something more. A sign, a message, or a way to communicate with the man Dean idolized for years.   
  
  
Watching the way the material bunches around Dean’s shoulders and upper arms, Sam can see the muscles his brother has gained recently. He smiles and knows that Dean is trying to change himself, on his own, without anyone to say otherwise. Sam wonders who he is trying to impress. It’s not like Dean has been on a date in a long while. Sam gets lost in his thoughts and he doesn’t hear Dean telling him to drop his feet.  
  
  
“Sam. I’m done now. Sam, drop my feet, dude.”  
  
  
Sam is so far gone that he stares, unfocused at his brother until Dean kicks his feet. He shakes his head and drops his brother’s feet as if they burnt him. Dean lands face first into the dirt below him.  
  
  
“Sam? What the hell?” He gets up and brushes the dirt off of his frame.   
  
  
“Dean. I’m sorry. I’ll get you some water.”   
  
  
Dean sighs and rolls his eyes. Abashed, Sam grabs his book and sits back against the tree doing his best to avoid his brother.  
  
  
He’s not sure what took place but knows something happened, and he can’t quite put his finger on it.   
  
  
The way his brother moves, smoothly up and down, through each pushup – the tension of his muscles – the slight shake within his body at having his younger brother hold his feet through the reps.   
  
  
Sam looks back up at his brother who has his head cocked to the side, grins wide. “My water, Sammy?”  
  
  
“Here, Dean.” Sam smiles as he tosses the water bottle to his brother.   
  
  
The warmth that radiates from Dean is a change. The relaxed appearance, the sparkle in his eyes, and the soft hum from Dean; Sam can see from his gaze makes him hold his breath. The moment is like a punch to his guts and it rattles him to his core. What the hell is going on with Dean? It’s as if Dean discovered who he was or admitted to himself, a deep, hidden secret. Sam wants to know what changed.  
  
  
Dean takes a seat right next to him, leaning up against the tree as he sighs.  
  
  
“Dad is pissed.”   
  
  
“That was a great kick, Dean. Dad should be pleased that you’re getting stronger.” After all, Sam is pleased with his brother’s accomplishment.  
  
  
“Thanks, Sammy.” Dean sighs and shakes his head in defeat. “I don’t think he sees it that way.”   
  
  
“He will when the time is right.”   
  
  
Dean grins, “But, it felt good.” He tells his brother about this obvious accomplishment.  
  
  
Sam smiles and bumps shoulders with his brother in encouragement and support.  
  
  
They both get comfortable against the tree while Dean, leans his head towards the sky – eyes closed – breathes in deep. Eyes still closed he bumps Sam again, letting his legs sprawl until his thigh presses against his brother. It's pure contentment and strange after all the weird signals from Dean. But, Sam is happy to have his brother by his side, fighting, and discovering what is in store for them in the long run.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
After a while, Dean nudges his leg and glances towards the Impala.  
  
  
“We’d better get going Sam. Before I get more damn reps.” He mutters through gritted teeth.  
  
  
“Sure thing Dean.”  
  
  
They get up and head towards the car. Sam reaches out and grabs Dean’s arm. Dean stops dead.  
  
  
“Sam?” He asks, biting his lower lip.  
  
  
Sam shakes his head to clear it because the look in Dean’s eyes makes him ache in his chest.  
  
  
“I just wanted to let you know, Dean, that was an amazing kick. It was powerful.” His voice is filled with confidence and pride for his brother’s accomplishment. The slight discomfort (after all, they never complement each other) is worth it, seeing the radiant smile form on his brother’s face.  
  
  
“Thanks, Sammy.” He whispers. Dean’s chin lowers to his chest and his gaze falls to his feet. It’s like his cheeks burn at the attention from another person, even if it’s his younger brother.  
  
  
They take their seats in the Impala, Dean behind the wheel and Sam in the passenger seat, as they head towards the motel. Sam watches the way Dean shifts the car into gear and leave the field behind them. He watches the muscles flex beneath the wife-beater pulling tight across Dean’s muscular chest.   
  
  
Sam takes the time to really look at his brother. Over the last few years Sam has noticed Dean grow into himself – becoming a man – the strong, skilled hunter he was pushed into being by their Dad.   
  
  
Dean passes the High School Sam is currently attending. Sam catches Dean who looks longingly at the school like he wishes he could attend - like he has missed out on an important part of his life. At that moment, he promises himself, and his brother, that they will get away from their father and his obsession and go to college. Have a normal life. Sam only needs to convince Dean it’s time to have a life he truly wants and deserves.  
  
  
He hates the tension that pulses through his brother’s body at the way their father treats him. Always a soldier that follows orders (like a good reservist and son) without question. Sam wonders how much is Dean or how much is influenced by a teenager who shows affection, praise, and understanding towards him while the same child fights against the wishes of their father.   
  
  
Sam knows it will be difficult for Dean to ever make that decision, but he has an entire year to work his charm on his brother. Sam wants the best for himself and his brother, even if Dean thinks otherwise. He deserves the same opportunities as everyone else.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Dean pulls into the parking lot and parks next to their Dad’s truck. Getting out of the car, Sam heads towards their motel room, number 16. Turning around, Sam notices that Dean hasn’t left the car. He sits there, staring blankly out of the car window, hands wrapped tight around the steering wheel. Slowly, he walks towards the driver’s side window and lightly taps it to get Dean’s attention. Sam watches the way Dean flinches at the unexpected noise before cautiously looking up at Sam.  
  
  
“Are you coming, Dean?” His eyebrows furrow with concern.  
  
  
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m coming, Sammy.” Dean’s voice is low and scrapes a hand through his hair.  
  
  
Dean sinks into the seat before he pulls the keys out of the ignition and opens the door. Before his brother is able to step foot outside, they hear a voice bellowing out to them.  
  
  
“Sam. Dean. Get inside and clean up. Pack your things. We’re heading out.”  
  
  
“A new hunt, Dad?” Sam yells back, hunched shoulders with his hands hidden in his pockets at the thought of moving again.  
  
  
“Yeah, Sam. Some creature messing with people’s dreams.”  
  
  
“Okay. We’re coming.” Dean says full of energy and ready for the hunt, eager to avoid the mishap of their training earlier.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
The Winchester boys sit in the diner a few miles away from the motel, trying to listen to their father explain the case to them. Sam finds it hard to concentrate. It seems overwhelming to be up rooted again, but it’s the story of their lives, whether he likes it or not.  
  
  
“What’s the creature doing with visions?” Dean asks.  
  
  
“From what I gather, Dean. It’s somehow messing with people’s delusions. Taking illusions from one person and switching it with another person’s. They then act out these dreams, but they’re not just dreams. They are their worst nightmares.”  
  
  
“How is that even possible?” Sam asks eyebrows raised and leaned forward.  
  
  
“I have no idea, son. But we’re going to find out. We’re heading to Salem, Massachusetts.” John’s grinning.  
  
  
“Salem’s a prime area for the Supernatural, right, Dad?”   
  
  
“Yeah, that’s right, Sam. We head out in the morning. Sleep well tonight, boys.” John states slyly with a grin.  
  
  
“Good night, Dad.” Sam returns, with a grin of his own.   
  
  
“Night, Dad.” Dean replies with his classic eye roll attached.  
  
  
They all leave the diner and head for the motel room. They are going to need all the sleep they can get if there is some monster messing around with people’s dreams. 


	2. Chapter Two

** Chapter Two **   
  
****

**Sam’s POV**  
  
  
 _Sam finds himself sitting under a large oak tree in a meadow gazing upon his brother. Watching the way Dean approaches him, hips swaying, with a bottle of water in his hand. Dean is wearing a tight, white, wife beater with black running shorts. His body shines with the sheer sweat filming his body.  
  
  
“Here, Sam. It’s fucking hot out here.” He says with a smile.  
  
  
“Thanks, Dean.” He says a blush creeps across his face.  
  
  
“How’s the book?” He asks while he positions himself into a pushup.  
  
  
Sam swallows at the way the muscles in Dean’s arms flex and contract when he’s in position. Noticing the tight ass through his running shorts, Sam shivers at the sight. He feels his arousal grow within this own shorts, and feels embarrassed for having these weird feelings for his brother.   
  
  
Dean starts counting while he does his pushup reps ordered by their Dad as he lowers himself towards the earth below him and grunts on the way up. The well-toned muscles hidden beneath the fabric of his shirt make him ache with want, to reach forward and expose them. Sam resists this pull towards his brother the best he can.  
  
  
Sam glances at the strong limbs holding Dean’s body in position. The slight bow of his legs is prominent in the stance. He observes the bead of sweat that rolls down his brother’s hair, onto his neck, and down his back, pooling on his lower back as the wetness on his shirt grows.  
  
  
“Sam. Stop staring.” He pushes out with a labored breath.  
  
  
“Dean.” He breathes out, embarrassed at the feelings pulsing in his body. He feels the want, the need, the urge to tackle his brother right there and do things he never thought he would want to explore in the first place._  
  
  
“Sam?” He can hear his name being called, but it’s too muffled for him to understand it.   
  
  
“Sam! Wake up dude.” Dean yells into the room.  
  
  
Sam jumps out of bed and lands on the floor with a bang. “Oomph.” He looks around and notices the way   
Dean leans against the doorway of the bathroom; a mischievousness grin on his face.  
  
  
“It’s about damn time.”   
  
  
“Sorry. I’m up now.”   
  
  
Shit. It all comes flooding back and suddenly he feels shy around his brother. His cheeks are burning red. He just had a dream, a weird dream, about his brother. Sam takes a quick peek up through his lashes and notices that Dean is wearing a white wife beater and jeans. The tight denim that are worn and fitted on his brother’s body. The jeans only highlight taut muscles and bow legs that could easily wrap around strong hips.   
  
  
Fuck! He can’t believe he’s thinking about his brother like this. Though he smiles to himself, knowing it’s going to be a long summer fantasizing about his older, attractive brother. He is screwed.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Once the Winchesters are packed up, they leave behind Seattle and head towards the East Coast, all the way to Salem, Massachusetts. A three-thousand-mile drive across country with his brother and father for a hunt, possibly a witch hunt, given the location they are heading to.   
  
  
About four hours into the drive, the simple sounds of the car, a soft hum from Dean, and the quietness of AC/DC runs through the speaker’s that lolls Sam to sleep.   
  
  
 _Sam and Dean are in their stinky motel room. There are two double beds with a red and brown comforter, frayed at the edges. The walls are a deep scarlet while the floor is a musty brown color with multiple stains coating the ground behind his feet. Cobwebs hang from the ceiling and dust covering every surface he can see.  
  
  
“Achoo.”   
  
  
Sam hears Dean sneeze once his duffel bag lands on the bed. This is the worst place they have been to in quite some time. He turns around and takes in Dean’s appearance. Dean seats on the edge of the bed, elbows upon his knees, and a tissue across his nose. His eyes are red and swollen from the amount of dust within the room.   
  
  
Sam heads towards the sink and wets some paper towels to wipe the surfaces in the room; the end tables, the main table, and counter in the small kitchenette. He heads towards his duffel and looks to see if they have any Benadryl to help ease his brothers’ symptoms. He inwardly shouts his appreciation for finding the white bottle of pills. Sam shakes two out, fills a glass of water, and takes it to Dean.  
  
  
Kneeling in front of his brother, Sam waits until Dean looks down at Sam with a questioning expression on his face.  
  
  
“Sam?”  
  
  
“Here, Dean. These will help with your sneezing.” He states calmly, handing Dean the pills and water.  
  
  
Dean tosses them into his mouth and gulps down the water in no time. Sam reaches to take the glass back from Dean who seems to be locked in position and can’t move. Sam in turn is ogling Dean with wide hazel eyes and out of nowhere he feels this need to move closer to his brother. Without knowing what was happening, Sam leans towards Dean and their lips meet in a simple press of skin on skin.   
  
  
Sam feels this surge of love and passion radiate through his body. He drops the glass and his hands wrap around Dean’s neck, pulling Dean closer. Sam tentatively opens his mouth and can feel Dean doing the same. The brush of his tongue on Sam’s ignites a fire within Sam, who pushes forward, making Dean, squeak in surprise until he is laying on top of his brother, kissing him hard and hungry. Sam pushed his tongue into his brother’s mouth, licks across his palate, to map out his brother’s mouth; soaking up Dean’s taste and scent. Sam can feel the strong pressure of Dean’s tongue on his, dueling for dominance. He takes advantage of his position, presses his body flush with Dean’s; feeling his rapid beating heart against his chest even with all the layers of clothing. Sam smiles from ear to ear hearing the moan he pulls from his brother’s plump lips’._  
  
  
“Sam.”  
  
  
He can hear his name being called and feels a hand on his shoulder, shakes him hard.  
  
  
“Sam. Wake up dude. We’re here.” Dean says with a mischievous grin.  
  
  
Sam blinks quickly, as his eyes adjust to the sunlight. He turns to face Dean and gasps at the sight. Bright green eyes sparkle in the sunlight and there’s a slight redness color to his brothers’ face.  
  
  
Sam sits up and rubs his hand against his face. He shakes his head and takes a few deep breathes to calm his erratic heartbeat. Peering at his brother, Sam feels a blush spread across his face. He can’t believe he had another goddamn dream about his older brother. Sam smiles at the thought. It must be some stupid crush that he can’t shake it off. It’s surprising, really, why he has this attraction to his closed-off brother. Dean is a man that keeps a close guard on his emotions, or ever shows that he wants something for himself. There has to be a reason, because it’s starting to freak him out to have these dreams about Dean!  
  
  
“Sam?” Dean asks with concern.  
  
  
He must have fallen silent. Sam gathers himself before looking up at Dean with honest eyes and a slight nod of acknowledgement. Adjusting himself in his seat and he realizes with a blush that his pants are tenting. Fuck! Seriously. Okay, calm down, and breathe.  
  
  
“I’m fine. Let’s go eat - I’m starving.” He needs to make himself feel and act ‘normal’ around his brother.   
  
  
Sam opens the door and rolls out, slams it shut behind him. He quickly slides his hand down to his groin and presses his palm firmly against himself, to relieve the ache in his balls.   
  
  
Embarrassment washes over him and he follows behind Dean into the diner where their father is waiting for them.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
“Why’d it take you boys so long to get here?” John’s already irritated, but before Sam can say anything, Dean responds.  
  
  
“What’s the matter, old man? In a hurry?” Dean’s reply is pure sarcasm and he adds his fashionable eye-roll.  
  
  
“Sit down, Dean. This is serious. We’re here for a hunt. Can you stay focused?” John berates his eldest.  
  
  
“Yes, sir! I’m focused.” Dean groans, but complies on the spot.  
  
  
Sam clenches his jaw, eyes tighten at the way Dean obeys without question and accepts the treatment as normal for a father and son relationship. Despite his heavy sigh, Sam gets more curious about this case because his Dad seems to be all over it and makes sure they are in tip-top shape to deal with this unknown creature.   
  
  
“Hey, Dad, can you tell us about this hunt?” Sam questions his father.   
  
  
It’s quiet and Sam feels the tension build among them. They’re all anxious about what the hunt is all about, and nervous as hell at what they are possibly up against.  
  
  
“Some people are having these dreams - nightmares – that get switched with loved ones and then they act them out. In all cases, some shredded red and black skin is left next to the victims. The reports state that the skin is textured like a bat. So we’re dealing with some form of winged creature with red and black skin.”  
  
  
It takes a few minutes before Sam can form a question to learn more about the case before they get down in dealing with said creature.  
  
  
“How is the creature using these nightmares against people, Dad?”   
  
  
His Dad takes a large swig of his drink and leans forwards across the table, apparently willing to share the rest of his information. Sam can feel the stillness of Dean’s body at the movement, as if it’s his fault they’re on this case to begin with. Sam’s glancing at Dean. Watching Dean sit there with his head up, eyes roaming the place, muscles clenching and contracting, waiting for the order, the demand, the harsh bark, from his earlier, sarcastic reply. It’s not Dean’s fault, it’s the creatures, and their Dad’s obsession with finding the thing that killed Mom.   
  
  
Sam nudges Dean’s foot slightly, adding a knowing glare. Dean needs to focus and pay attention for what’s to come next, not think about how this is his fault. Dean nods slightly and looks back down at his plate. He raises his gaze to their father as John begins to speak.  
  
  
“Sam, I have no idea how this creature is using people’s nightmares against them and making them kill. We need to research further; which means we will need to get ahold of the skin. Though I’m not even sure that will get us very far. I’ve never heard of a creature like this before, so we will need to work as a team on this case. Can you boys handle that?”  
  
  
“Yes, sir!” Dean complies quickly without thought.  
  
  
Sam is to slow in answering. Too slow for his father, as John is demanding, “Can you, Sam?”  
  
  
“Yes, sir! I can handle it. Even the research.” Sam watches the pleased and proud expression on his Dad’s face. A quick glance shows, Dean’s is cold and hurt without even knowing it. Sam’s gut clenches, as he receives the praise while Dean’s is just expected, regardless of how he would respond. Sam wishes he could do something to help and reassure his brother.   
  
  
They finish up at the diner and head towards their respective vehicles. Their Dad takes off down the road in a rush to get to the other side of the country. Sam shakes his head in amusement and chuckles to himself. Clearly their father is still pissed by the take down and for them to be late to the diner. Normally he’d be mad at his Dad for taking off, but now he feels proud that he trusts them enough to go, after everything that happened.  
  
  
Dean punches Sam in the arm. Eyes green as emeralds in the bright sunlight on the horizon. Sam hits Dean back with a grin of excitement in their new adventure.  
  
  
A slight nod of his head and Dean pulls out of the parking lot. They’ve got a long ride a head of them.  
  
  
Dean pulls into a motel at midnight and gets a room. Though Dean looks pissed off as he returns to the car. He tosses Sam the room key and after glancing at the number, Sam leads them to their room. Where he stops and gasps at the sight. One twin bed with a brown, lumpy pull-out couch. Couches fucking suck, but before Sam can get a word out Dean speaks.  
  
  
“Take the bed, Sasquatch. I’ll take the couch.”  
  
  
“Dean? You sure?”   
  
  
Dean wouldn’t normally just offer up the bed. Sam has to wonder if Dean has other thoughts about the situation.  
  
  
“Sam. Take the bed.” His cuts off and there will be no further discussion.  
  
  
Sam doesn’t need to be told twice. And then, being the pain in the ass little brother he is, he races into the bathroom before his brother, and takes a long heated shower to ease the ache in his muscles from sitting in the car for so long. Dean hates to stop for long periods of time; only long enough to take care of ‘baby’ and grab some food for the road.  
  
  
He lets the hot water beat down until he feels the muscles loosening up. It feels wonderful as his body relaxes, Sam gets lost in his thoughts. His thoughts are of Dean and his bright, green eyes that are his answer to his soul.  
  
  
 _Sam opens their motel room and encourages Dean to enter first. Sam supports him with a hand on his lower back, slightly pushing him forward into the dark room. Once they are inside, Sam uses his foot to close the door behind them, as if they are hiding some secret, they don’t want a single soul to know about it.  
  
  
The next moment he has his brother pushed up against the door and breathing harsh at the effort of keeping Dean pressed tight on the wooden door. Dean tries to catch his breath at being manhandled by his little brother.   
  
  
And it’s less than a heartbeat before Sam’s mouth is covering Dean’s, not wasting time or allowing his brother a pause to change what is happening in this moment. It’s a pulse deep within his soul that he needs to release, and he hopes that Dean understands and has the same pulse vibrating in his body.  
  
  
  
The kiss is hard, furious, and possessive. Sam’s need and want overpower the fact that Dean has responded to the kiss and pushes his tongue between plump lips. Maybe they’ve both been too scared to express and share the knowledge with each other. But now they’ve lost the fight, they get lost in the overpowering sensations, the lust, and the excitement of making the moment last. The sound of a guttural moan escapes Dean’s mouth into his sends shivers so powerful that they rack his body; he is on the edge for more.  
  
  
Sam takes that as a good sign and kisses along Dean’s strong, angular jawline. The sounds and moans he pulls from his brother are music to his ears. A sound he was looking for but never let himself find. Having Dean up against the door gives him the strength to lift his brother up, his hands firmly under his ass. A hard, firm ass that belongs solely to Sam and no one else. Dean lets out a squeal and Sam grins wide at his brother sounding like a girl. He knows Dean will deny it later, but Sam will remind him every second he can since Dean always calls him the girl.   
  
  
Dean wraps his strong, bow legs tight around Sam’s waist, his erection pressed against Sam’s stomach. The feeling of Dean hard within his tight jeans makes Sam’s cock twitch at the promise for more, a lot more than he ever bargained for.   
  
  
Sam takes a risk and carries Dean towards the closest bed. Dean tenses within his arms and once Sam drops him on the bed Dean lets out a giggle - a giggle of all things – and sits with this ridiculous grin on his face. Heat forms on his cheeks, his neck, and his chest, the redness of being both embarrassed and turned on by his little brother. It’s something Dean never will admit to but seems to content to explore together.  
  
  
Sam crawls up Dean’s figure, spreads his brother’s legs, as he slides into place between them, on top of his extremely hot body. A smile forms on his lips while Dean gazes at him with anticipation of what is to come. He places his right palm over Dean’s heart and can feel the rapid, erratic pulse against his flesh.   
  
  
The ache within his jeans threaten to cut off his circulation and he distracts himself by leaning towards Dean’s face. Surprised, Dean moves his head up towards Sam, and they meet half way for a chaste kiss to become heated.   
  
  
Sam edges his tongue into Dean’s mouth and the initial soft press of muscles against one another changes fast. The duel for dominance kicks into gear and an escaped moan brushes up against his lips. Fuck! Sam never thought he could get any harder, but his cock was sure pleased with Dean’s sounds.  
  
  
It pushes him forward and he gets to his awaited prize in his brother’s faded blue jeans. Feeling spurred on, Sam kisses along Dean’s stubbly jawline and feels his brother’s cock twitch against his hip. He has a grin on his face, a warmth spreads across his body at his brother’s reactions. Reactions he wrings from his brother’s body. His big brother.   
  
  
Sam sucks at a creamy white ear lobe and elicits both a gasp of pure ecstasy and the buck of Dean’s hips towards his aching groin. Sam scrapes his teeth against the sensitive spot of Dean’s ear lope, as Sam trails down Dean’s chest and kisses along Dean’s collarbone and between his pecs. On his way past he casually flicks his index finger against a hard nub, the moans escape Dean’s mouth turns him on even more, how was that even possible? The thought that he is able to make Dean feel good and loved is the most important thing he wants for them.  
  
  
“Sam…” He says out of breath.  
  
  
“I got you, Dean. It’s going to be okay. Let me take care of you.” Sam tells Dean with a smile on his face as he continues his journey down Dean’s body, placing chaste kisses along his brother’s torso.  
  
  
One kiss towards Dean’s belly button and Dean jerks up and bucks his hips up against Sam’s chest. Sam grins into the spot and dips his tongue into the hollow, and sucking up with a pop.  
  
  
“Fuck, Sam. Stop teasing.” He moans.  
  
  
“I’m getting there.” Sam chuckles to himself at how turned on Dean is, and how much he is turned on by having his older brother underneath him.  
  
  
Sam pulls back Dean’s boxers in a slow motion while his brother hisses at him. Dean’s cock springs free and pre-come is already leaking heavily. Sam gently wraps his large palm around the thick dick of his brother and licks at the head, collecting the stream of pre-come. Dean arches on the bed, head thrown back in pure ecstasy, and the slight pressure of his hips meeting Sam’s forearm laying below his belly button.  
  
  
Sam sucks in the head and lowers his mouth on Dean’s throbbing cock, feeling the thick vein rub against his tongue. It overwhelms him, the taste and the smell of his brother’s musk makes him suck Dean’s cock harder.  
  
  
“SAM! Fuck!” Dean screams.   
  
  
Somehow Dean is looking at him with his lust blown eyes, cheeks feverish and flushed with embarrassment. His plump lips form an ‘O’ at being satisfied and a blush promenaded his cheekbones.  
  
  
Their gazes lock and it takes a moment for Sam to realize his brother’s seed just shot in his mouth. The warm sweet and salty taste floods his mouth and he swallows it down like he hit the jackpot._   
  
  
“Shit!” Sam screams as cold water starts to beat down his over sensitive body. He shot his load against the shower wall and turns around to face the spray to clean the mess off before jumping out of the freezing shower. Sam was so lost in his thoughts he ran through the hot water – and Dean is going to be pissed. But he was more worried about the dreams than Dean - they are getting ridiculously hot and intense. He doesn’t know what to think of them, of what they even mean in the long run.   
  
  
Sam loves his brother with all his heart, in a brotherly way that is. But this…this is in a romantic fashion: it’s wrong and sick. Incest. It doesn’t happen – shouldn’t happen - but then again, their family has never been like other families or brothers.  
  
  
He knew his relationship with Dean was different, closer than most brothers would ever be. But he’s never thought of Dean, romantically, not before these dreams. And now Sam swallows hard and covers his mouth; and at the same time can’t help wondering what Dean would think of them, or them as a couple. Probably never in a million years.  
  
  
“Sam. Are you okay? Your food is getting cold.” Dean yells through the door.  
  
  
“Yeah Dean. I’m fine.” Sam yells back.  
  
  
They eat their dinner on the small table in the room; the silence is over bearing. The concerned glances Dean, keeps giving him make him feel overwhelmed, nervous but, better yet, make him think more into the looks from Dean.   
  
  
“Sam, are you sure you’re okay? You seem on edge.” Dean says, tilting his head and staring at Sam.  
  
  
Heat rises up his face, and turning away Sam looks towards the window, “Yeah, Dean. I’m fine. Tired.” Sam tells his brother, trying to get him off the subject.  
  
  
Sam gets up and throws the rest of his meal away and climbs into bed. Dean follows right behind him and gets into his own bed on the couch, not even bothering to open it up. 


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**  
  
 **Dean’s POV**  
  
  
Dean wakes up early and makes coffee. As it brews, an aroma like burnt rubber fills the air. He smiles wide as the smell reminds him of baby peeling down the highway. He hopes it doesn’t wake his brother up.  
  
  
He observes Sam’s struggles under the sheets in his sleep, body in motion: Dean is a light sleeper and throughout the night the constant tossing, turning, and rustling from the bed make him wonder what Sam is dreaming about.  
  
  
He hopes it’s good because he has no idea what could be causing him to mutter under his breath.   
  
  
Sam is on summer vacation, and until this hunt he had his nose stuck in a book all the time. The only time he puts it down is to eat, sleep, and use the john.   
  
  
Dean retrieves his coffee and sits down. His back against the armrest and his long legs stretched out in front of him. He takes in his brother’s features while he sleeps. Sam has finally found a comfortable position to sleep in, on his back with his right leg bent up and his other leg, stretched out towards the end of the bed with his arms up towards the headboard like goal posts.   
  
  
Strangely, he now seems to be relaxed after a horrible night’s sleep. Dean hates to wake him up, but they need to get back on the road; they’re meeting their Dad at the diner for dinner.  
  
  
Dean wrinkles his eyebrows and stares straight through his brother, who is at the end of the couch, leaning against the armrest with a small smile on his face.   
  
  
“Dean?” Sam whispers.  
  
  
He jumps at the sound and shakes his head before looking up at Sam. Dean gasps at the sight of his brother. Sam is soaked in his own sweat and his pajama bottoms hang low off his slender hips, his hip bones can be seen clear as day. His hair is soaking wet at the tips, and his face is all feverish. Sam looks like he got hit by a truck.   
  
  
“Sam? Are you okay? You look like shit?” He asks clutching his amulet.  
  
  
“Yeah, Dean. I’m fine, bad dream. Well, a crazy dream. He felt so real.” He tells Dean, rubbing his neck.  
  
  
“Jump in the shower, Sam. It was only a dream. Then we’ll head out.” He tells him.  
  
  
Sam nods and heads to the shower. Dean waits to hear the water be turned on before he starts to gather their belongings up and take them to the car.  
  
  
Dean hopes Sam is feeling okay. It’s very unlike him to be having bad dreams. The last time he had one was when he was a little kid and asked where their daddy was. He wonders what sort of dreams his brother could be having that cause him to become drenched in his sleep. He hoped Sam wasn’t coming down with something. It would make this hunt worse for him if he was sick. Even though he felt guilty about it, Dean couldn’t wait to hear more about this creature they are hunting. He hopes the hunt will be a quick job so Sam can get back to his holidays and feeling better.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Sam is leaning against the car with his right foot resting on the door, book in hand. Dean smiles to himself, pleased that Sam cleaned himself up: softened features, grin wide, and eyes shining brightly in the sunlight. The shower obviously helped ease his muscles and help him to recollect himself. Though, he grits his teeth when he realizes where Sam placed his foot, on his  _baby_ , like a goddamn stool.   
  
  
It’s raining outside and the thick, dark clouds roll above them as they drive down the interstate. The steady beat of the rain against the windshield washes over Dean’s body and calms him down from the dizziness he felt in the motel room. He hasn’t seen Sam like that in years. Dean is out of his element and the ability to read Sam’s expressions and body language. Dean knows his brother isn’t a little kid anymore, but he will always be worried about him whether Sam likes it or not. It’s in his blood and personality makeup, and it can’t be shut off.   
  
  
He loves his brother too much to let anything happen to him.   
  
  
Dean pulls over at a small run-down diner for lunch. They need to stretch and refuel before continuing. Hopefully, the rain will let up and Sam puts the damn book down so they can talk about this creature. All he can hear is the pitter-patter against the window and the slow, easy breathing from Sam. All he has done since getting in the car is read that damn book.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
  
They’re on the road again and Sam is sleeping with his head on Dean’s shoulder. The rain stopped a short time ago and the sun is now shining brightly against the horizon. It’s not often that Dean has the quiet space to look around him. The constant lines of flourished green blossoms of the trees move past him before he can really see them. Dean can see birds flying around and diving in and out of the flourished green trees. As he watches a bird swoop down, landing on the bush, pecking at the red berries, and making a meal of it.  
  
  
The simple, peacefulness within the car was relaxing. And it was better with Sam. It has been a while since he and Sam spent quality time with each other. Dean was always encouraging Sam to do well in school and make something of himself, so he could hope for a better life, something better than the family business. Dean knew damn well, whether or not he liked it that this was his life. All he wanted to do was make sure his little pain in the ass brother was safe and happy doing what he wanted to do, not what he was told to do by their hard ass of a father.  
  
  
Dean turns the radio on low to let Sam continue to relax and sleep until their next stop, hoping it would be the diner in Salem. He hasn’t driven too much further when he realizes he has to pull over at the next gas station, to fill up and replenish their snacks. They still have eight hours to go till they reach Salem. He pulls in a spot and reaches his hand over to rest on Sam’s shoulder before shaking him gently awake.  
  
  
“Sam? We’re at a gas station. Want to grab some snacks, take a piss before we head out again?”  
  
  
“Yeah, Dean. I’ll grab some snacks and some peanut M&M’s.” Sam tells his brother and head’s inside the station.   
  
  
Dean smiles as Sam walks away. His eyes linger on Sam as he walks through the doors to the station and notices the way he towers over everyone and the muscular frame he is sporting looks good on him. Dean’s gaze ends up on Sam’s ass and its hard and tight, perky even, and he sucks in air as the wind is knocked out of him.   
  
  
Dean shakes his head and sighs, taking small breaths in and out to slow his pounding heart. He opens the gas tank and reaches for the gas hose, placing the nozzle into the tank. Dean considers the changes in his brother’s appearance: when did that happen and why do they make the heat spread across his face? The slamming of the door brings him back to reality. He’s never really looked at Sam in that way before.  
  
  
“Hey Dean. I got us some snacks and I got you a cup of Joe.” Sam says, smiling.  
  
  
Dean pulls the nozzle out of the tank and places it back on its hook. He closes the gas tank and pays before sliding into his seat behind the wheel. Dean looks over to Sam with a grin on his face and heads towards the interstate.  
  
  
“How much longer, Dean?” Sam asks, face tightened and eyes narrowed. Looks like his little brother’s good mood didn’t last long.  
  
  
“About eight hours. The last stretch before we hit our destination.” Dean replies.  
  
  
“Dean, what do you think about the case?” He asks sliding forward in his seat.  
  
  
“I think it’s out of our league. An unknown creature that seems like a bat. A bat that can be harmful.”   
  
  
“It’s a creature, Dean. Hurting people, with nightmares. Do you think it’s a witch?”  
  
  
“Sam, you know how I hate witches.” Dean snarls in disgust. “I think we have a lot of research to do on this creature.”  
  
  
“How can a creature control dreams? How does it switch a person’s dream with another? How does it make a person do horrible things to others?”  
  
  
“I don’t know. I have no idea. It sounds like a god or evil spirit.” He says with a fake smile.  
  
  
“Come on. A god or spirit? I don’t think so.” Sam releases a self-deprecating laugh.  
  
  
“Well, what do we know? It has black and red skin that feels like rubber. Sounds like a bat creature with special powers that can control minds. Mind control, Sam!” He gasps at the thought.  
  
  
“A creature with mind control. Yeah, okay, shit - it seriously has to be a God or evil spirit.” Sam frowns and sighs at the mere thought.   
  
  
The rush of warmth that spreads across Dean’s face makes him look out the side window, before he turns back towards the road they are driving down. It has been a long while since either Sam or Dad seemed interested in his thoughts or views about a hunt. It makes him feel wanted and needed, part of the team to take out this creature and other monsters they will face in the future.   
  
  
“Nice thinking.”  
  
  
“Thanks, Sam. So if it’s a God or Spirit, which kind can it be?” He asks.  
  
  
“I’m not sure on that, Dean. It would have to be related to dreams and nightmares, since all the victims are acting out their worst nightmare once the dreams are switched.”   
  
  
“True, Sam. It would have to be related to nightmares, since all the victims are being haunted by their fears.   
  
  
“Any ideas on how will we kill it?”  
  
  
“Well, maybe if it’s a Spirit, it could be a simple salt and burn.” A huge grin and excitement on his face while he recognizes this could be a quick hunt after all. Once they killed the creature, Dean will get to spend some time with Sam before school starts again.   
  
  
“Do you think it will be a simple salt and burn case? And would burning the bones stop the nightmares?” Sam questions, tilting his head to the side.   
  
  
“It’s a Spirit - a ghost. Burning the bones should take care of it.” He tells Sam.  
  
  
Sam bites his lip and rubs his hands down his pant legs. Dean has a sudden urge to reassure his brother.   
  
  
“I’ll always have your back Sammy. I won’t let this creature get you.” Dean tells Sam with affection and love. Reminding his brother that he will always keep him safe.  
  
  
“I know, Dean.” He responds light-heartedly.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Sam gathers up his book from the backseat and opens it up to the last page he was reading. He pulls his left foot up onto the seat, leg bent at the knee, and sinks back in his seat and hums softy to Metallica.   
  
  
With a pleased smile on his face, Dean relaxes into his seat. He keeps an eye on Sam, with concern and wonderment. Dean couldn’t quite figure out this emotional tug in his gut towards his brother that was making his heart ache with confusion. He has watched Sam grow up from a needy little boy, to a well-rounded, head-on-his-shoulders man, who knew what he wanted out of life and would achieve it whether others liked it or not.   
  
  
Deciding not to think about it, Dean hums along with Sam and taps his fingers to the beat against the steering wheel. He gets lost in the song and starts singing out loud. The bemused laughing beside him breaks his thoughts and the blush of embarrassment is back on his face. God what is wrong with him? Blushing is for girls, not Dean Winchester, the hunter. He takes the time to peer at his brother and sees his look of content. Sam is happy to be sitting in the passenger seat of the Impala and enjoying the comfortable silence between them.   
  
  
The older Dean gets, the more he feels the distance creep in between them. Maybe it was knowing Sam wants to get out of the business of hunting and head off to school. He hopes that’s not the case, but knows deep inside his heart it will happen, and it will be for the best, that Sam is somewhere safe. Of course Dean will still look out for him as much as he can, but sooner or later Sam will hate his brother and no longer want Dean in his way of getting what he wants, his true desires of a “normal” life.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
After a few hours Dean can only hear the sound of his humming and the quiet beat of the music pierce the air, until the soft sounds coming from the passenger side make him stand on edge. Sam is slouched in his seat, legs folded up at his knees and splayed open, his hands clenched and unclenched at his sides.  
  
  
The small whimpers and moans that escape his brother’s mouth are a turn on. Dean is shocked to realize he is jealous that Sam was getting some in his dreams, while it has been over a year since Dean has gotten laid. He shakes his head in frustration and humiliation as he feels his cock growing within the confines of his jeans.   
  
  
He raises the volume of the music in the car to drown out the sounds his little horny brother is making right next to him. Dean stops at the red light and takes a good long glance at Sam and knows from the moment Sam’s tongue sweeps across his bottom lip that he’s close to coming in his dream and it makes him hornier that he could have imagined. Dean wasn’t sure if he was more turned on from the sounds coming from Sam or compensating for the lack of sex in his life.  
  
  
The car behind him honks their horn at Dean and brings him back to reality and he pulls onto the highway. He can’t believe Sam is having a wet dream in the car as they head closer and closer to their destination of Salem.  
  
  
Dean turns the volume up even higher and gets lost in the words and heavy beat blasting through the speakers. He works hard to get Sam and his hard cock out of his head because it’s confusing the shit out of him.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
Sam is tired of reading his science fiction book. He tosses it into the back seat and shifts to get comfortable. In the end, Sam slouches down into his seat, long legs spread out as much as he can in the car. His hands rest comfortably at his sides with his head leaned back on his seat.  
  
  
 _The moment Sam has Dean in the motel room he kicks the door closed. He pushes Dean up against the wall next to the door and latches onto his brother’s thick rosy lips. Dean moans into his mouth and becomes putty in Sam’s arms. Sam rakes his hands down Dean’s body and grabs under his brother’s ass, lifting him up the wall. Dean instinctively wraps his strong, lean legs around Sam’s waist and presses his groin into Sam’s.  
  
  
Leaning Dean against the wall Sam rips his shirt right off his body, buttons flying across the room and landing on the wooden floor. He pulls his own shirt up and over his head before latching onto Dean’s perky nipple. He sucks it into his mouth and bites at the hard nub. The moan he can hear from Dean is amazing and makes his aching cock twitch and grow within his pants.   
  
  
Sam’s hands travel towards his brother’s belt buckle, he undoes it and pulls it from the loops of his jeans. He unbuttons and unzips Dean’s denim, the head of Dean’s cock immediately peeking out over the waistband of his boxers.  
  
  
He pushes Dean’s legs off himself as Dean’s jeans pool at his ankles and he steps out of them. Sam wastes no time in once again grabbing his brother’s tight, firm ass in his hands, lifting him up and slamming him against the wall. Watching Dean’s cock grow harder and thicker against his body makes him grind his hips up into his brother’s waiting ass.  
  
  
“Stop teasing, Sammy.” He cries out from the sensations.   
  
  
“I’m getting there, Dean. Soon, Dean.” He adds, teasing his brother.  
  
  
Sam urges Dean higher and his brother holds on tight. He leans forward to offer Dean more support while he quickly works to unbuckle his own belt, before unbuttoning his jeans, and letting them slide down his legs. He kicks his foot out slightly to remove his denims from his body and to move them away from their current spot right near the window: anyone walking by could look in at the beautiful and amazing view of Dean’s hard, tight body.  
  
  
The moment Sam adjusts Dean to a more comfortable position is the moment their cocks rub against one another. Needy moans escape them both.  
  
  
Sam wraps his large palm around their dicks and collects the dripping pre-come. The moan he pulls from Dean makes him want this even more and he doesn’t want to waste any time worrying about how he wants to fuck his brother. And given the way Dean is staring at him with lust and love shining through, Dean must feel the same. This is a moment he wants to keep stored in his memories for years to come.  
  
  
Dean leans forward and claims Sam’s mouth as Sam travels his hand over the curve of his brother’s ass, ghosting down until his fingers brush against Dean’s puckered hole, quivered in its wait of anticipation.   
  
  
Sam slides his hand farther down until his finger finds his brother’s entrance. He uses his slick finger to circle his hole and apply pressure without penetration. Sam wants to ease his finger into his brother’s body with love, not with the animalistic nature that he feels pulsing in his blood.   
  
  
The hisses and groans of “more” from Dean, and the way he arches against Sam’s chest encourages him to continue to what his heart desires: his brother. Something he never thought would be possible, but pleased to know they were destined for this to happen.   
  
  
Sam pushes his middle finger into Dean’s tight, hot heat, and past the tight ring of muscles.   
  
  
“Fuck. Sam.” Dean screams, wanting and needy.  
  
  
Sam latches onto his brother’s nipple and sucks the tiny hard nub as he eases his finger slowly in and out of Dean’s body. The movement becomes easier and Dean starts to push down, wanting more.  
  
  
Sam pulls his finger out slowly before wrapping his hand around their cocks, sliding his hand up collecting the pre-come in one smooth movement. He spreads their wetness over his fingers before he lets his hand drop again, and pushes two fingers inside his brother. They go in smoothly and he immediately begins to scissor his fingers, to stretch his brother for what is to come.  
  
  
Moans and whimpers enter the air as Sam teases Dean with his mouth and fingers; Dean leans his forehead on Sam’s shoulder and sucks on the skin. The rake of teeth pushes Sam over the edge. He pulls his fingers from Dean’s ass, pulls hard and tight across their dicks one last time, gathering come to spread it across his engorged member.   
  
  
Holding his cock at the base, Sam steadies himself before reaching for Dean’s ass. Grabbing onto one cheek, he holds him open and slowly pushes inside his brother’s tight and waiting body. The feel of teeth sinking into his shoulder pulls a groan from Sam’s throat and he leans up to capture Dean’s lips with his own. There is a fight for dominance through the kiss, which Sam wins as he finds a steady, short quick thrust up into Dean’s willing and wanting body. The heat of the kiss turns frantic, and Dean’s sharp tug of his hair, Dean has Sam picking up his pace. Now that Sam has released his mouth, Dean kisses along his jawline and pushes back against Sam, meeting his thrusts. Sam can feel the deep pull of his balls and his animal instincts take over, pounding into his brother as he lets the want take over his body.  
  
  
Dean whimpers and writhes against Sam’s chest, and the pure ecstasy of Dean’s release sends Sam over the edge: he’s pulsing inside his brother’s hole, squirting his come as his brother squeezes, like a hot vise around him.  
  
  
It takes him a few minutes to recover, but when he does the sated look on Dean’s face and the love shining in his eyes is more than Sam’s heart can take. He never thought love could be like this and finding love in his brother, a man he thought never could love another human being in his lifetime? It’s too much.  
  
  
“Sammy.” Dean says in a weakened voice as a flush creeps across his face.   
  
  
He’s too shy to express the feelings pulsing through his veins at what happened between them. But Sam isn’t going to let him hide. This is too important.  
  
  
“Dean. Look at me.” Sam waits until Dean raises his eyes. “I want you. I love you.” Sam tells Dean, filled with the love and understanding at what this means for them._  
  
  
Sam jerks awake at the gentle hand shaking his body.  
  
  
Sam opens his eyes and they land on Dean’s – eyes locked. The look of concern and worry etched on his face makes Sam wonder what his body was doing while he was sleeping.  
  
  
“Sam. We’re here. Are you okay? You seemed to be deep in a dream.”   
  
  
“I’m fine, Dean. It was just a dream. A very weird dream.” Sam feels warmth flood his face as he remembers the details.  
  
  
Turning away from Dean’s concern he gets out of the Impala and rakes his hand down his face. His jeans are tight across his groin, and he groans at the thought of fantasizing about his brother and wanting to fuck him senseless. How can he have these kind of feelings for his brother? Will Dean find out and how would he react? Does he want Dean to find out?  
  
  
Taking a quick peek at his brother, all he sees is Dean looking at him with concern and confusion.  
  
  
“Sam, maybe you shouldn’t read anymore.”   
  
  
As if it’s the book is causing the dreams in the first place!  
  
  
“I’m fine, Dean. It was just a dream. It just… it felt completely real.” Sam forces a smiles back and is pleased his response is honest. He doesn’t want to worry Dean any more then he has to.  
  
  
Sam has no idea what to make of these dreams, or his mixed feelings towards Dean. He loves his brother and would never want to hurt him in any way. That’s normal. Wanting to fuck his brother? Not so normal. The fact that these non-brotherly feelings feel so right is freaking him out!  
  
  
Abruptly, he makes the decision to leave Dean at the diner. He’s going to need some time to figure out how he feels about the dreams and his growing feelings. He hopes Dean understands that he needs some time to figure it all out, and hopes to be forgiven for his irresponsible actions.


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four**  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
Finally, they arrive at the diner to meet up with their father. Sam and Dean enter together and find John sitting in the back at a booth with a cup of coffee in his hands.  
  
  
John looks up at them with a small smile on his face, happy that his boys are here to back him up. Sam grins widely at their Dad; pleased to know how much he trusts them to have his back while hunting monsters. They may have their differences, but Sam wants his father to get peace for their mother’s death.  
  
  
They slide in the booth across from their father, both taking a long needed drink of water. Sam can feel the heat radiating off Dean’s body, and then the slight pressure of leg resting against the leg. Sam flinches at the touch and quickly moves away, sliding closer to the edge of the booth.  
  
  
John takes in the scene with raised eyebrows. What happened? Why is Sam so keen on getting away from his brother when he is near his idol?  
  
  
“So, how was the trip, boys?” John asks and shakes his head.  
  
  
“The trip was fine, Dad. Drove straight through. Sam slept in the car, only taking breaks to read his book.” Dean teases.  
  
  
Sam makes a face at Dean’s teasing but answers readily enough. “Dean was a champ. Kept us on track.” He tells his father with a smile across his face.   
  
  
“Glad things went well.” Happy that he’d read the situation wrong. John continues. “So I got some more information about this hunt. The creature is some form of a shape-shifter. The victims’ relatives shared they saw their family member talking to a tall and muscular man with black shoulder length hair, high cheek bones, and thick red lips. The few that spoke to him said he was very witty and intelligent towards others around the area.”  
  
  
“Is it a God or spirit, Dad?” Sam asks, leaning forward, and his gaze locked on his father.   
“I think it’s a spirit. A spirit that can turn from a dark-winged creature to a human being. They have the power to control people’s dreams. Well more like their nightmares. Making their nightmares come true at their own hands.”   
  
  
“A spirit and a shape-shifter… At least it can be killed with silver bullets. How will we know who this guy is?” Dean asks.  
  
  
“Well, he’s pretty distinctive looking. Very pale, from what I got out of our waitress.” Sam looked at him curiously. “Her boyfriend’s nightmare was suicide. He hung himself in the basement. A rubber piece of skin found near his body.”  
  
  
“So the shape-shifter shifts into their true form at their victim’s death or their final minutes?” Sam asks fascinated by this creature.  
  
  
“That’s what I’m thinking, Sam. The creature turns to their true form in their pleasure of watching their victim die. The skin is black and red; rubber like, but somehow stretches like human skin.” John shakes his head at facing this creature.  
  
  
“So, what’s the plan, Dad?” Dean asks.   
  
  
Sam thinks it’s the way Dad has been ignoring Dean since they got here. Maybe Dad is still pissed about the sparring match? Not that that’s fair for Dean. Sam watches Dean slouch in the booth and wishes his brother had the guts to stand up to their Dad and say what he is thinking. Dean never says what he truly feels, thinks, or wants about any given situation. It frustrates him to the point of wanting to kick his brother’s ass when they return to the parking lot. Then he remembers those dreams in his head for the past few days wondering if they ever crossed that line, he hoped Dean would open up to him, truly open up or stay in his shell forever. Dean deserves to be happy like everyone else and do what his heart desires in the long run.   
  
  
Sam watched his Dad take in his brother’s question as his eyebrow raised to his hairline and waits for the response.  
  
  
“You boys will need to do some research and visit the local morgue to see the victims and the skin found next to the body. I will conduct the interviews with law enforcement and we will be ready to find this creature and put them down for good.”   
  
  
“Sounds like a plan, Dad. We’ll get right on it after some well-needed rest.” Dean whispers, knowing how much Dean hates research, but he’s still not ready to cross his father.  
  
  
“Yeah, Dad, after some well-needed rest.” Sam agrees and knows it’s the best option to plan his escape from his brother and father.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
They all leave the diner within a few minutes of each other. John takes off down the road and heads for the local bar while Sam and Dean head towards the motel. Dean heads towards the office to get a room. Sam hangs back, watching the way Dean walks with long steady strides with a slight waddle due to his bowlegs and the clench of his ass with each step he takes.  
  
  
Sam sighs and blushes at the image of his brother and decides this is the best time for him to escape. He has his duffle bag hanging off his shoulder and he turns back up the road towards the diner.   
  
  
Sam nervously enters the diner and finds the waitress that served them earlier that night.  
  
  
“Hey, is there a bus station nearby?” He asks with a warm smile on his face.  
  
  
“Hi, yeah there is, about six blocks up the road.” She responds with a friendly smile on her thin lips.  
  
  
“Thanks.” He tells her and heads his way up the road to the station.  
  
  
He buys a bus ticket to Maine with cash that he pick-pocketed from Dean’s duffle bag while he was getting them a room in the office. Sam needs to get away and go to an unknown place, to clear his mind and think about the dreams he has had about his brother and how he feels about them.   
  
  
He loves his brother, don’t get him wrong, but in a romantic way? It’s wrong and taboo. How can he love Dean like his father loved his mother? Maybe it’s not so far off course to think about Dean in this way. Sam has always thought that he and Dean were closer than most typical brothers; the bond they share is deeper with understanding and respect for one another. And then there’s the urge to stand up and protect the other at all costs. Maybe this feeling was deeper than he ever could have imagined. Maybe Sam could accept it in himself, but how would Dean feel learning about this information? And Dad? Would they understand it and accept it for what it’s worth, or run from the freak Sam truly is after all?   
  
  
No, Sam decided. Dean might freak out, but then he’d think long and hard about how he feels about the situation and – hopefully - the hidden and embarrassed feelings he holds close to his heart. Maybe Dean was afraid his feelings would mean something to someone else, including his own brother and father.   
  
  
Sam shakes his head at his thoughts and takes a seat on the ratty bench and waits a half hour for his bus to arrive. He thinks about Dean, and how he feels being alone, and he keeps looking for his brother. Dean’s not stupid and he’s always thought about Sam first. If Sam is missing Dean is going to find him. There is fear, shame and guilt pulsing through his veins for leaving Dean, and it will piss him off and leave him wondering why Sam left in the first place. Sam feels bad, but how can he tell his older brother, his hero, and protector “hey, I freaked out over wet dreams about you?” Can Sam do that? Hell, no. Not even if he was in a relationship that is so tight and strong.   
  
  
He hopes that Dean understands that Sam needs space to cool down for a few days from the long, road trip cross country. Sam hopes his father doesn’t discover he is missing and left Dean a sitting duck in a motel alone.   
  
  
The announcement over the intercom lets him know his bus is here. He heads outside and boards, glad for the space to think about his feelings for his brother. Sam wants to figure out deep within his soul his feelings for his brother and how to deal with them before having that “chick-flick moment” with his brother about it.  
  
  
It’s so stupid. They should be able to talk openly about their feelings and not be afraid of the consequences, or being judged for the thoughts running through his head. Dean has always been supportive of his choices and thoughts, whether he truly understands them or not. His brother might not be the sharpest crayon in the box, but Dean is smart for his own good.  
  
  
He leans back in his seat, head resting on the window. God, he can’t believe he is running away? Well, not true. The dreams freak him out because they started after he kept looking at Dean  _like that_  during the sparring match with their father.   
  
  
As the bus pulls away from the station and rides along the interstate, Sam stares out the window. The trees, the clear night sky is filled with bright golden stars, a fitting backdrop to his thoughts. Sam has noticed his brother in a new light and now he’s scared that Dean won’t understand the love he has for him. If he is honest with himself, these dreams are showing him what he truly wants in life. Their life has never been easy and to fall in love with your brother, is like taboo.   
  
  
Sam’s brain stops. Did he just say that he’s in love with his brother? Shit! Sam’s mind spirals for minutes before the new emotions pulse beneath his skin, urging him to get back home, to get back to Dean. But Sam ignores it. He needs some time to clear his thoughts and figure out his feelings about what he wants – does he want Dean to become his lover? Sam needs to answer these questions honestly before he can decide on how to approach the topic with Dean. His brother will freak out on him if he were to make the first move, but then again, it would have to be him. Dean can’t even share his feelings with Sam or even their father. It’s a lesson he would love to teach Dean, the importance of expressing oneself with others.   
  
  
Sam settles in, listening to the quiet sounds of the bus’s radio and the simple, easy beat coming through the speakers. Looking out the window, he sees towns, neighborhoods, and families along the route to his final destination. He sees the hope, peacefulness, and acceptance of others doing what they want to do and fighting for what they want in their life.   
  
  
And all he can think about is Dean. What is his brother doing at this moment? What does Dad think about it? Have they found anything about the creature? Will Dean get over this episode and want to continue to protect him after all?  
  
  
Dean might be pissed, but he will forgive Sam regardless. Sam has come to know that Dean can never stay mad or angry at Sam or his actions, no matter what. He only hopes that Dean will understand why he ran; the sick and twisted thoughts running through his head.  
  
  
Which turns his thoughts back to his brother – well, his body. Sam has been watching Dean truly grow into himself. He figured Dean would have before he reached 18, but then again, Dean has seemed to be a late bloomer. His mind too focused on his little brother then who he was after all, until now. The new muscles Dean has forming, and the freckles that cover his entire body, suit him to his core. And Sam wants to touch, to explore, to feel, and fuck senseless against a wall or the mattress. He wants to watch the pure ecstasy on Dean’s face and watch him come against himself as Sam comes in his brother’s tight and waiting hole.  
  
  
Caught in his thoughts, Sam didn’t realize the bus stopped at its destination and is just sitting at the platform in the station. He shakes his head, gathers his belongings, and gets off the bus where he steps out into a sauna from the nice cool air contained bus.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **Dean’s POV**    
  
  
The man behind the front desk is on his cell phone and arguing with a potential customer over needing a room for a man in a wheelchair. He can hear the man arguing out loud, unaware of a customer standing in front of him. Dean shakes his head and wonders how people treat others that are different from them when they have no clue about the situation they are in. Despite his understanding, he stands there in annoyance, arms crossed, and eyes towards the ceiling, at the amount of time dealt with the customer.   
  
  
Dean was tired and so was Sam. The last cat nap Sam had was interesting to say the least, and it worried Dean that he didn’t know what was going on with his brother. Dean was never the one to express his feelings or have the will to be open with others about anything; Sam was more like that and it suited his personality. But now he was acting differently…He was the kid that always knew what he wanted in life and knew how to achieve it, and didn’t mind telling you! Sometimes he wished he was more like Sam.   
  
  
The clerk behind the desk finally finished up with the man in the wheelchair, and Dean stepped up to ask for a room.  
  
  
“How can I help you sir?” The man asked.  
  
  
“One room. Two double beds for a week.”   
  
  
“That will be 400 for the week. Room 124.” The clerk hands Dean the keys as he hands the man the money for the room.  
  
  
“Thanks, man.” He says with a nod.  
  
  
Dean pockets the keys and heads back out towards the car and his brother. Sam is most likely leaning against the Impala with his arms crossed against his chest with a look of aggravation on his face. Dean can imagine the look of frustration that it took forever at getting a room and pointed questions wondering if Dean couldn’t score some chicks number.  
  
  
To be honest, Dean isn’t interested in random hook ups and it surprises him. Instead of looking to strangers for affection, he is looking at Sam. He felt the warmth of Sam’s large, strong hands around his ankles and the simple gestures between them lately. It’s been good for his psyche, good for their relationship, really. Dean never really gave anyone the opportunity into his heart or love for that matter. He only let in his Dad and brother, though his father is an oversight to say the least.  
  
  
Dean loves his father… but at the same time he wonders what the man truly thinks of his oldest son. Does he care about Dean as a son or his military soldier? Does John even understand the struggles and challenges he deals with in the world for the life they lead, or is it pushed to the side to focus on Sam? Sam, the better son, the son with promise and hope, while Dean is the one, to make mistakes for following orders like a good little soldier.   
  
  
Dean tries not to think of the differences between them, but sometimes it’s hard to do. He feels lucky that he is confident in his own body, and understands the strength he holds. Dean knows that his body can be used as a weapon, and it’s becoming stronger all the time. The muscles he is forming raises his self-esteem and knows what a great fighter he’s becoming. Dean’s transforming into a soldier, obedient to a fault, a right-hand man. No girl would want him and he knows it. He is the equivalent of a douchebag, which no girl would be caught dead bringing him home to show off to her parents.   
  
  
He has come to realize that he is a mixture of his Dad and Sam, with a touch of his Mother. Dean has never had the time to discover who he truly is, because all he ever got in life was taking care of Sam and following his Dad’s orders and commands. He cringes at the thought that he knows his family better then he knows himself. What kind of person does that?   
  
  
Someone who has not had the opportunity at being their own self growing up and learning who they are and what they want out of life.   
  
  
Dean knows he has a pretty decent relationship with Sam, who in his own way supports Dean at making the right decisions and choices for them as a team. John on the other hand barks orders at him and see him as a soldier, not a son. Dean can remember many nights being scolded by their Dad for the irresponsible actions he made when it came to Sammy. He can remember leaving Sam in the motel room while Dean played arcade games in a bar; a monster came, Dean wasn’t there to protect him, and Sam almost got hurt or worse, killed. Dad ripped him apart verbally for not doing what he was told and since then Dean has to prove to his father he can rely on him. Dean was a kid too and deserved to be a kid like his brother. It’s one thing he missed out on life, something that he will never get back.   
  
  
Shaking his head, Dean brushes off his thoughts. He can’t worry about that now when he knows Sam is waiting for him. Dean picks up his pace to get to Sam quicker, eager to head to their room for the night. They will be there at least a week, so they may as well get comfortable and settled in.  
  
  
Dean gets closer to the Impala, his baby, and as he cites the car, he starts to stagger as the muscles tighten ridiculously throughout his body. As he gets closer to the car, and all he can hear is the beating of his own heart. He has trouble catching his breath as he realizes that Sam is not there where he should be waiting for him.   
  
  
Dean rocks in place, darting his gaze across the parking lot.  
  
  
“Sam?” Is that his voice? It sounds so far away and trembling with fear.  
  
  
Dean never gets afraid of anything, but it’s a lie. This is his worst nightmare. Deep down, he is afraid of losing his brother. He never wants to know what life is without his brother. Despite this fear all he can think about is  _where is Sam and what will Dad do once he finds out Sam is missing?_  
  
  
Dean calls Sam in an attempt to locate his brother. His phone doesn’t even ring - it goes straight to voice mail and now Dean’s face turns ashen and in a shrill voice rises ten folds. His breathing is shallow and he sits on the hood of the car. He tries thinking about the last few days and why Sam would leave in the first place. Was he kidnapped? No. No… there is no sign of a scuffle and Sam’s belongings are all gone. So why did he run? Did Dean do something that pushed Sam away? The insecurities shuddering his body make him sweat uncomfortably. He can feel it drip down his shoulder blades, pooling at his lower back. He makes no effort to brush it away.  
  
  
He can’t process. Hopping off the hood, he moves and sits behind the wheel of Baby. He turns the key and peels out of the motel parking lot. Dean heads in the direction of the diner, which is now closed for the night. As he continues down the road and notices the bus station. Dean pulls into the parking lot and gets out. He walks in and looks around: no sight of Sam. Dean can feel the fear picking up and sweat continues pouring down his body. Sam is not here. Not anywhere to be found. Dean kicks himself, and blames himself for Sam leaving and prays he will come back.  
  
  
Dean drives down the road for an hour before turning around and heading back to the motel. Parked in the parking lot is his father’s large, black truck. He slowly pulls the Impala next to the truck and turns the engine off. Quickly grabbing his belongings, he heads into his room, locking the door behind. Dean throws the bag onto the bed and looks through it to grab the salt to make the salt lines.   
  
  
Turning on the TV, Dean waits for the shoe to drop. What is he going to tell his father? He takes a deep breath and the door opens without him realizing it.  
  
  
“Boys? Are you here?”   
  
  
Dean breathes in deep and closes his eyes tight at the heavy footsteps of his Dad entering their room. He holds his breathe and waits for his father’s response.  
  
  
“Dean! Where the hell is Sam?” He shouts.  
  
  
“I – I don’t know. I went looking for him.” Dean tells his father avoiding eye contact. He can’t look at the disappointment that is most likely on his face.  
  
  
“Dean! Look at me son. Now!” John yells, and yeah, his flaring nostrils, chin held high, and the sound of knuckles cracking.  
  
  
“Yes, Sir!” Dean responds. His body begins to shake in fear at the anger radiates through from his father.  
  
  
“Where could he have gone? And what happened to make him leave Dean?” He shouts and sways on his feet.  
  
  
Dean takes a hard look at his father and realizes he face is mere inches away from him. Dean realizes he is drunk, he can smell the liquor on his breath, and he won’t remember much in the morning. Despite his father’s drunken state, Dean can’t control the shakes and shivers, racking his body completely freaks him out and he can’t control the uneasiness he feels in his gut. The look on John’s face is the same as when they were sparring in training a few days ago.   
  
  
Before Dean can even respond to his Dad, he is on the floor. Blinking, he can see spots and more than one Dad fills his line of vision. John just punched him in the face. Feeling around his eye, Dean knows the bruise will be killer once it forms on his pale face.  
  
  
“I don’t know where Sam went. And I would never do anything to make him leave!” Dean screams at his father. It’s with the same force he used behind his kick. He sways as he gets up and stumbles, once he is on his feet.  
  
  
John comes at Dean again and lands a punch to Dean’s solar plexus. Dean doubles over as the air is   
forced out of his lungs.   
  
  
“Where could he have gone Dean?” His Dad is throwing another punch to Dean’s gut even as he speaks.  
  
  
Dean manages to dodge. And answer the question. “I don’t know. I’ve already looked at the bus station.” Dean says looking up into his Dad’s eyes, locking their gaze, “Maybe he took the bus out of town.” He lowers his eyes and backs away into the bathroom.  
  
  
“Well, you better find him! I mean it, Dean.” John orders loud and clear as he exits the room.  
  
  
Dean turns towards the mirror above the sink. His left eye is already swollen shut and turning into a dark purple of a bruise. He lifts his shirt up inch by inch and watches another set of dark purple bruises form against his chest. Bile rises up his throat and he turns in time to vomit in the toilet. He needs to find Sammy, or his father will truly disown him. Despite the need to find Sam right away he thinks about a shower.   
  
  
Dean makes a decision.  
  
  
Turning on the shower, Dean waits for the water to get hot before stepping under the stream.  
  
  
He shakes violently in the stall and watches his breathing because it fucking hurts. His Dad beat the shit out of him - like he would purposefully make Sam leave or do something to make Sam leave. Never in his life.   
  
  
 _Why does Dad think I’m this horrible evil person? I will always take care of Sam no matter what the costs are._  But something made Sam leave, and Dean wishes he knew what that was.  
  
  
Dean scrubs his skin raw under the pounding water until it starts to run ice cold. He towel dries himself off and grabs the sweats and T-shirt he placed on the toilet seat cover, to head out and grab some ice for his bruises. He makes a couple of trips at collecting enough ice to help the swelling and bruising. Hopefully no one will question him at what happened to him. Dean is still shocked at how drunk his father was, despite the way he carried himself into Dean’s room.  
  
  
Taking a moment to look through the drawers in the kitchen and finds some zip-locked bags, he makes two bags full, and lays down on the bed, placing one on his chest and the other one his eye.  
  
  
He lays there and wonders why he gets the short end of the stick. Maybe if he was smarter and applied himself more they might look at him differently. Dean wishes he could be more like Sammy and live up to his potential, though he needs to truly discover who he really is before that could happen.   
  
  
Sighing, he continues to think about possible reasons behind Sam’s disappearance and his father being so pissed off at him. Pissed off enough to beat him again. It was that sparring match all over again. He doesn’t know what to do, all he knows is he wants things to be different, wants to be respected for who he is, and to be given the time to discover who he is in this world with his brother and father.  
  
  
He makes another attempt at looking for his brother but gets nowhere, Dean can’t find him. Pissed off at not being a better brother and hunter, he heads to the motel and will try again in the morning.


	5. Chapter Five

**Chapter Five**  
  
 **John’s POV**  
  
  
John wakes up to the feeling of hammers in his head trying to break his skull. He gasps in shock as the memories filter back from last night. He was intoxicated: had difficulty standing up, staggering, and swaying, as he picked the lock to his sons’ room. He found Dean alone and yelled and screamed at him for Sam leaving and taking off. It had to be something Dean did – John knew in his heart and soul Dean would not let anything happen to Sam. Dean loved Sam more than words could describe, and John didn’t know how to describe the close bond they shared with one another.  
  
  
Sitting on the edge of the bed, nausea and regret rise in full force and he’s running to the bathroom to hurl in the toilet. Stomach emptied, John sits in front of the toilet, and he starts thinking about Dean and what must be running through his son’s mind. The son that has been following his god damn orders for years without question. The son that never questions his place in the family business or his role of protecting Sam at all costs. Dean who doesn’t know who he is. John wishes he knew how to help Dean find a way to discover his true identity, rather than being the hard ass copy of John himself.   
  
  
John never wanted this life for his boys, yet here he is bringing Dean down along with him. He mentally kicks himself for thinking Dean couldn’t handle things in his own fashion when Sam even handles himself quite well away from John.   
  
  
John splashes water on his face and takes a long hard look at himself in the mirror. He sees his eyes are flat, eyebrows pinched, downturned mouth, and a stooped posture that he can’t control his anger and need for revenge for the death of their mother. That’s hard enough, let alone having their mother being ripped away from his boys at a young age. It pains him to see how Dean struggles within this world and he has no clue what to do about it. John doesn’t know how to change it or make it better for his oldest. He regrets treating the boys differently but tells himself he did the best he could.   
  
  
He thinks about how he will face Dean this morning when they head for breakfast and discuss the hunt. He hopes that Dean will be okay and not ask questions, even though sometimes he wishes he would speak up and express what is running through his mind.  
  
  
The knock on the door jerks him awake from his thoughts. He sighs and opens the door to find Dean standing there with a big black and blue mark on his left eye.   
  
  
“Morning, Dad. Breakfast? Discuss the case? Or find Sam?” He asks nervously while shifting from one foot to the other.  
  
  
“Morning, Dean. Breakfast and discuss the case. As for Sam, let him come to us since he knows where we’ll be for the week.” He tells him.  
  
  
The sigh of relief coming from Dean is music to his ears. John wouldn’t have been surprised if Dean had gone looking for Sam. Like always, he would have taken the blame for actions that never really was the cause of Sam leaving. John was pretty damn sure Dean wasn’t the reason why Sam left. He looked down at his feet as he closed the door behind them and walked the block down to the diner. He didn’t want to consider who may have been the reason.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
They finished their meal and the tension within the air was felt throughout the entire diner. John felt guilty for hurting his son in the manner he did, but the fear for Sam’s safety spoke louder than the reasons behind Sam leaving. Blaming Dean for it was wrong and he should have known from the start that Dean would never do anything to harm Sam in any way. But he didn’t have another way to react.  
  
  
“Dad?” Dean asks guarded.  
  
  
“Yeah, Dean.” John says as he looks up at his son.  
  
  
“So, about the case? What the plan?” He obviously hopes they can put the Sam incident behind them. John can sense the panic coming from his son, and it makes him hate himself even more. Dean never deserved to be treated like that whether or not he was drunk or not. John shakes his tight fists and slams them down on the table.  
  
  
Dean jumps at the unexpected noise and pushes his body closer to the window and away from him.   
  
  
John quickly gathers his emotions and puts them in check. Last night must have been worse than he thought. He can’t believe that he scared Dean enough to jump on the spot.   
  
  
“I’m sorry, Dean. I’m angry with your brother. I’m sorry for taking it out on you.” He tells Dean, knows his son hears the sorrow in his voice. Dean nods, accepting the apology, like always.  
  
  
“It is fine, Dad. So about the case?” He asks hastily.  
  
  
“We need to take a look at the bodies and the skin of this creature. I was thinking you could take a look at the victims and the skin while I do the interviews.” He tells Dean, confident Dean can handle the job.  
  
  
Dean tilts his head to the side and he relaxes. He’s comfortable like this, used to discussing the case. The color returns to his face and he has that stupid mischievous grin on his face. The one he uses when he gets to go on a hunt. It warms John’s heart at the change, even as it hurts to know that he was the cause of it.  
  
  
“What do you want to me check out specifically with the creature skin?” Dean asks.  
  
  
“See if you can take a piece so we know exactly what it looks like. And see what the doctors think about the skin and if they know what it could be from.”   
  
  
“And I’ll head out and talk with the police. See what I can find out. Dean, please be safe. As for Sam, I’m sure he’ll find you when he’s ready.” John says.  
  
  
“Okay, I will head there now. See what I can find out. Be safe, Dad. If I hear anything about Sam I’ll call you.” Dean says with respect and military style. He heads out the diner and starts the mission he was handed.  
  
  
John pays for their meal and heads to the police station. He asks to see the Chief of Police and follows the officer who escorts him to the Chief’s office.  
  
  
“Chief Johnson? I’m John Carter and I’m from the FBI. I’m here investigating the victims dying from acting out their worst nightmares. I was wondering if you could share any information about the case with me.” He speaks to the Chief with confidence and respect.  
  
  
“Have a seat, John. Coffee?”  
  
  
John shakes his head, as the Chief continues, “The victims that we have been dealing with have feared suicide or murder. The first victim had a twin sister, and in his nightmares he feared that he would kill her. Not long after, the family called saying he killed himself. The second victim thought her boyfriend was cheating on her, and if she caught him than she would kill her herself by hanging. The last victim feared something would happen to his child after getting custody and he kills himself to protect his son.” The Chief says, reading from his notes on the conversations he had with the families.  
  
  
“So each victim was terrorized by their nightmares and killed to protect their loved ones?” John wants to be sure he understands.  
  
  
“Yes. This is exactly the case. At each site, we found a large chunk of skin lying next to the victim’s bodies. We think this mystery skin has a connection with all the victims, although I don’t know what the connection would be. Maybe you can figure it out?” He tells John and hands him a sample of the skin.  
  
  
“Thanks for the information. I will analyze the skin. I will find the connection. And I’m going to help prevent this from happening again.”  
  
  
John hadn’t expected it to be so easy.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
John heads back to the hotel and takes a seat at the table. He pulls the plastic bag out of his pocket to look at the skin he was given by the Chief. Taking the skin out of the bag, he holds it in his hands. It feels like rubber and it stretches; it really is like the skin of a person, but somehow completely different. It’s the texture and thickness. He rubs his thumb over the skin and a shiver runs down his spine, and his blood seems to pulse strongly, as if it was on fire. John drops the skin on the table, quickly grabs a bottle of water which he gulps down.  
  
  
He sits back down at the table and carefully places the skin back into the plastic bag. John jumps as he hears heavy footsteps outside the room, the door squeaks open.  
  
  
“Dad?” Dean asks, slipping his hands into his pockets.  
  
  
“Dean! You’re back. How did things go for you?” He asks jolted.  
  
  
“Well, it’s like we thought. All the victims killed themselves due to their worst fears. One victim feared they would kill their sister and he killed himself. It’s the same with the other two victims, same mo. I did see the piece of skin they collected from the cases, Dad. It has a weird texture, different  _and_  similar to human skin. It must be a creature that can turn from a monster into a human being and vice versa.”   
  
  
“Nice work, Dean. I have a piece of the skin here too. It is weird and very similar to human skin. I hope we can figure out who it is and take care of business.” He tells Dean.   
  
  
John notices the blush spread across Dean’s face. He wonders at its presence, then realizes it is being complimented on his hard work for the case. It brings a little peace to his soul, knowing there is something he can do to heal the damage he caused his son. He never should have hit him in the manner he did.  
  
  
There’s a knock on the door and John looked at Dean, who just shrugged. John tip-toes towards the door while he pulls his gun out from his waistband. He opens the door to take a look, and sees that it’s Sam, and John throws the door open wide.  
  
  
“Sam?” John asks.  
  
  
“Yeah, Dad. It’s me. I’m back. I’m sorry. I – I had to get away.” He says, glancing at his feet.  
  
  
“Come inside, Sam. We were just talking about the case. You’re back now. Let’s get to work.” John says. John can hear the sigh and eye roll coming from Dean, and when he turns to look at Dean, it’s written on his face.  
  
  
The first compliment from him towards his eldest son ended once Sam was back in the picture. John mentally kicked himself for being an idiot. Before he can do anything, Sam steps inside and takes along hard look at Dean. A sheen film of sweat covers Sam’s face as he comes and stands right in front of his brother.  
  
  
“Dean, what happened to you?”   
  
  
“Nothing, Sammy. I just got into a bar fight. It was my fault.”   
  
  
Dean’s posture is racked with guilt, and John felt nauseous at the thought. Dean blames himself for Sam leaving, even though it wasn’t his fault to begin with. And now the need to seek approval from his own brother speaks loud and clear at the insecurities Dean deals with. Watching his boys interact with each other breaks his heart. He sees Sam reach up and Dean relaxes. John knows deep within him that they need each other in their lives.   
  
  
“Dean, are you sure you’re okay?” Sam asks again while his large hands cup Dean’s face. His thumbs tracing along Dean’s cheek bones and Dean relaxes, leaning into Sam’s gentle touch.   
  
  
“I’m fine Sam. I got away. It’s all that matters, right?” He says with a small grin upon his face. “Though, you should see the other guy.”   
  
  
They stand there for several long minutes until Dean mildly wraps his hands around Sam’s wrists and removes his brother’s hand from his body. The pain of removing the touch from him looks like it hurts more than John can say. He turns around to give his boys a moment, while using the mirror to watch their interactions.  
  
  
“Dean, are you sure? It looks bad.” Sam says, in a pained stare and cups Dean’s face again.   
  
  
John notices the moment Dean looks up at Sam and shakes his head from side to side and softly whispers, “No.” John has to close his eyes and control his breathing.  
  
  
“Where else does it hurt?”   
  
  
John snaps opens his eyes and holds his breath as Dean bashfully lifts his shirt up to reveal the multiple bruises that color his pale chest.  
  
  
“Shit, Dean! What was this fight about?” Sam asks, already knowing the answer, the only answer Dean can give to Sam.  
  
  
“A stupid blonde chick.” Dean says with his head down and shoulders slumped forward.  
  
  
Sam shakes his head, annoyed at the thought, and pulls Dean in for a hug. This is quite new between them, and as Dean allows it, a smile forms on Sam’s face from ear to ear.   
  
  
Glad to know his boys are over the fact that Sam left, John turns around to ask them about dinner when Dean whispers to Sam, “I’m sorry for being a jackass.” The tears form in Dean’s eyes and he closes them and holds on that much tighter to Sam. Dean has never shown his emotional side or let his walls down and its clear to John that Dean would protect Sam for life.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
They head to the diner and John brings Sam up to speed about the case and what they have found so far.   
  
  
John notices Sam constantly shoots glances at his brother, keeping an eye out on him, while Dean stares out the window. He looks up at Sam and wonders what happened while he was gone to find himself.  
  
  
“Sam. Where did you go?” John asks.  
  
  
“Um. I went on a bus ride. Cleared my mind.” Sam replies.  
  
  
“Did you clear your mind, Sam?” John asks, trying for calmness between them. They fight for no reason and half the time neither one of them knows what the fight is really about in the first place. John is the father, he needs to make the effort to change things between him and his sons.  
  
  
Sam glances at Dean and he has doubts about his brother’s story and injuries. John watches Sam focus on Dean for a period of time like, he wants to ask him something. He even opens his mouth before he changes his mind. John can see the tense rigid posture Dean has. He sits upright, head and shoulders angled towards the window, and his body plastered as far away from Sam as he can get.  
  
  
Sam shakes his head and his eyes with concern, briefly meets John’s eyes. “Yeah, Dad. I cleared my mind.” He glances back at Dean and sees the shakes that now rattle his brother’s body.  
  
  
Dean excuses himself to take a piss. It gives Sam the opportunity to speak with their Dad.  
  
  
“Dad. Is Dean, okay? Was it a bar fight? He looks freaked out. I’ve never seen him like this before.” Sam whispers across the table leaning in towards his father.   
  
  
  
John shrugs his shoulders and shakes his head. Keeping his voice low, he replies. “No, Sam. I don’t think he is. I’m not sure about the bar; I had a few drinks last night. I found him like that this morning.” He cringes at the thought that he just lied to his son about Dean’s situation. John could never come out and state that he harmed Dean over something stupid, that he let it happen in the first place.  
  
  
Dean returns and slides in the booth.  
  
  
He glances over at Dean and relaxes a little when Sam starts to tell them about the creature, and Dean starts to respond. Since he had researched on his journey to clear his head.  
  
  
“Well, I heard that the winged-creature can be seen in the victim’s nightmares. It looks like a human bat.” Sam says.  
  
  
Dean chokes on his soda. “A human bat? What does that even look like? How are we gonna kill it?”   
  
  
“You okay, Dean?” John asks, thumping him on the back before Dean shoots a daggered look towards him, and okay, he’s never asked before, but John knows he needs to change. Sam coughs uncomfortably, feeling the tension in the air around them.  
  
  
Looking up, John sees Sam’s hazel eyes wide open with an unreadable expression. He’s analyzing the interaction that happened in front of him.  
  
  
John shrugs it off as nothing and waits eagerly for Sam to continue.   
  
  
“Yeah, Dean. A human bat. It can be killed like a Wendigo with a flair gun.” Sam says.  
  
  
“Nice. So how do we find it?” Dean asks with a grin.  
  
  
“Well, the victim touches a piece of the skin from the creature and then feels a sensation like fire pulse through their body. Once this happens, we wait for the person to fall asleep and dream. The person sees their worst nightmare of a family member, and a different family member gets the victims dreams.”  
  
  
John gasps and looks at Sam deeply. There’s very little doubt that he will become the next victim. God, whose dreams would he see? And who would see his? He doesn’t even want to think about it at the moment.   
  
  
“Dad? Are you okay?” Dean’s hand is on John’s shoulder shaking him into reality.  
  
  
“I’m fine, Dean. Only taking in the information.” He says looking at his son reassuring him with a grin plastered to his face. John watches Dean nod and then looks back up at Sam to hear more about their case.  
  
  
“Sam, how do you know all this?” John asks wondering.  
  
  
“I met this girl on the bus, and she told me that her best friend was afraid that she would be taken away and tortured by her kidnapper. Well her best friend kidnapped this girl and tortured her until help came. She killed herself in the jail cell. The girl mentioned her friend talking about some winged creature she saw in her dream.” Sam tells them. He keeps looking back and forth between his father and brother. John can’t help but not notice the concern for Dean is evident on his face, and he wonders about the real story behind it.  
  
  
“So what should we do about it, Sammy?” Dean asks, eyebrows drown together.  
  
  
Taking a deep breath in, Sam begins, “Well, I thought if we could get a piece of the skin and touch it, maybe we can solve the case before we have the urge to fulfill the nightmare.” He tenses up, feeling the glares being aimed at him for the suggestion.  
  
  
“Sam! You must be joking right?” Dean grits his teeth.  
  
  
“Dean, I think it’s the only way.” Sam catches sight of an expression Dean never releases: his face turns white with the hint of confusion.  
  
  
“Okay. So if that’s the case, if we do touch the skin, whose dreams will they get?” Dean asks, looking worriedly between his father and brother.   
  
  
John has the sense that Dean hopes it’s not him. He doesn’t blame him, he wouldn’t want his dreams on show either. It would leave him wide open with no way to hide his secrets whether he liked it or not.   
  
  
John has to hide his smile behind his hand because this would be the best time to really discover who Dean is. Whether it’s shown to Sam or himself. Or maybe he doesn’t want to see. Dean was a boy who loved his family and baby brother. Once the house fire came and John handed Sam to Dean it was like a light had been switched; it was a moment that defined Dean to his core, the simple act of saving Sam from the fire. It was answered in the manner of protecting Sam for life and help him achieve his dreams, the way he told Sam,  _I can wait for mine to come at the right moment_. At this time, it is highly unlikely that Dean will get to follow his dreams. But John still secretly hopes for more for Dean than a life of putting Sam first.   
  
  
And Dean deserves it, not recriminations and violence because he blames the older son for the actions of the younger one. Not that he would know John thought that, because beating your son up and thinking the worst in him isn’t actually encouraging. John hates that he could think of his child in this manner, and at the same time wants Dean to be able to stand up and fight for what he wants despite the message being handed to him at a young age. He doesn’t even think that he may have beat it out of him.  
  
  
“Dean. Don’t worry about it. Your dreams are full of porn.” Sam says with a chuckle.   
  
  
“Sam! What the hell?! I don’t just think about porn. I have dreams too you know.” Dean says with a clenched fist and slams it against the table. His posture is tense and the anger radiates off him in waves is overwhelming to say the least.  
  
  
“Boys! Enough.” John yells at the boys with a stern face. He isn’t looking forward to this. “It will most likely be Sam and I. We are quite a pair – whether we like to admit it or not.” 


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nightmare sequence. Physical abuse/beating scene. And a sexual scene between father and son.

**Chapter Six**  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
They’re back at the motel, sitting at the small table with pie and ice cream, courtesy of Sam. When he made the decision to come back and join his family, it was because of the hunt, and finally making peace with the feelings he has for Dean. The dreams he was having about Dean are molded into his mind and wishes for them to come true when the moment is right. Sam is okay with this. Although now he is angry and his own stupidity. At the time it made sense; just leaving his brother without a word. Plus there was his father’s comment at the diner, about them being quite a pair whether they want to admit or not. Sam knows deep down that he is like his father, but the differences are important: Sam has the love, caring, and protectiveness within him that his father lost after his wife died in the fire.  
  
  
Once they finished eating their desserts, the boys went to their own room. Sam stepped out to grab a soda from the vending machine. When he knocked on the door to their room, he was expecting Dean to answer the door, not their father. His heart pinged at the thought Dean wasn’t around, however when Sam stepped into the room, Dean was there. Taking in the sight of his brother, Sam gasps, finally realizing the pain his brother was in. Around his left eye, a purple-blue bruise bloomed, and he was hunched over as if a truck hit him in the solar plexus. It hurt like shit to see his brother like that, and Sam questions if that was really what happened. Dean has been in bar fights before, but he’d never been hurt like this. It’s more like the sparring matches with their Dad, and that thought makes Sam’s heart clench within his chest. The thought that Dean got a beating from Dad over him leaving pains him more than he can say. Dean never deserved that, no matter what the cost was to Sam. Though Dad did say he was drunk, but still that’s not a reason to beat your son, especially when he follows his every word like an obedient soldier.   
  
  
It’s as if John can feel Sam’s anger towards him. Making his excuses, he leaves the two boys alone. That suits Sam just fine.   
  
  
With their father gone, Sam can find out the truth about what happened while he was gone.  
  
  
“Dean. How do you feel?” Sam asks peering down at Dean who is avoiding his gaze. He knows there is a chick-flick moment on the horizon, and it’s going to happen whether Dean wants it too. Sam wishes Dean would express himself instead of hiding himself from the world. Maybe now that Sam know how he feels, he can help Dean understand his own feelings, too.  
  
  
“I’m fine Sammy. How about you? Like to tell me what happened?” Dean asks, concern evident in this voice. That’s Dean, not letting anything be about himself.  
  
  
“Umm…Dean, I needed to get away. It’s hard to explain. And I don’t think I’m ready to share it with you – not yet, anyway. I’m sorry. I just need to figure this out on my own.” Sam tells his brother.  
  
  
Dean nods. “I understand that, Sam. But shit Sammy, I panicked and wondered where the hell you went.” He turns his head towards the window and takes in a deep breath. “I thought I was the reason you left. Do you know how that feels?” Dean shares with Sam. He moves quickly to get up, away from his feelings, knocking the chair over in the process. The crash of the chair against the floor is the only sound heard. Dean begins to pace from one side of the room to the other.   
  
  
“Dean! I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you, or even leave you. I just needed to get away and figure this out.” Sam slowly stands uplifting the chair back before stepping into his brother’s path to meet him eye to eye. “Why did you think it was because of you?” The small gasp that escapes Dean’s throat clearly indicates that Sam hurt his brother, and Dean isn’t quite ready for the concern and reassurance that Sam wants to give. But Sam knows Dean needs this.  
  
  
“Dean. Stop and listen to me.” He tells his brother with a slight whine to his voice and his puppy dog eyes. Surely his brother can’t resist that?  
  
  
Dean stops fidgeting but keeps looking down, clenching his fists until his knuckles turn white. Then he looks up and Sam can see the fear that shines through his eyes and body. The intensity makes Sam gasp in response. Sam has never seen this look before and he wonders if he and John pushed Dean too far this time if Dean thinks he deserves this.  
  
  
“Sammy, if it wasn’t because of me - then tell me, please?” And Dean is begging. It breaks Sam’s heart, but he isn’t ready to share.  
  
  
“Dean… All I can say is – I had this vivid dream, and it showed me what my heart wants. It freaked me out and, well, I needed some time to myself.” Sam can see the disappointment creep up on his brother’s face before it morphs into understanding. It’s not the answer Dean is looking for, but it’s a response that Dean can work with and find out later.  
  
  
“Okay, Sammy. I get it. Must have been some dream to freak you out that bad. I don’t blame you for your actions, just a heads up would have been nice though.” Dean says with that grin back on his face. Sam is glad that Dean is okay for now.   
  
  
“Thanks, Dean. Now tell me about the bruises?” Sam knows he’s pushing Dean here, but he needs to know.  
  
  
The effect is instantaneous. Dean looks down at his feet his body shaking and his breathing becoming erratic. He takes a few steps back and looks out the window gathering his thoughts of how he should and wants to response to the question.  
  
  
“It’s not his fault. He was drunk.” That tells Sam all he needs to know, but he waits for his brother. Dean sucks in a deep breath and turns his back to Sam and his body shakes even more violently as he gets himself together. “God damn it, Sammy, it was Dad. He was drunk and blamed me for you taking off. I deserved it since I probably am to blame.” Dean spits it out like they’re the dirtiest words ever to cross over his tongue. Sam watches as he licks his lips nervously. It’s a gesture that never happens until Dean is sick or injured and even then it doesn’t always happen.  
  
  
Sam gasps in shock as the protectiveness he has discovered on his little adventure comes through. He crosses the room towards Dean, who has his back towards him, and wraps his long arms around his brother, trapping Dean’s arms against his sides. Dean goes tense in his arms and the hitch in his breath catches Sam’s attention.   
  
  
“Dean. I’m sorry. You don’t deserve it. You never deserve to get beaten for my actions. It was my fault and my fault alone.” Sam gently soothes his brother. He’s used it before, because it calms Dean down when he is upset.  
  
  
As Dean continues to tremble, he tightens his hold on Dean. A single drip of liquid lands on Sam’s hands, and he whispers reassurances into his brother’s ear.  
  
  
When the tension leaves Dean’s body and he relaxes within Sam’s arms, Sam feels more tear drops landing on his hands. With a start he realizes that Dean is crying. He can feel the violent shakes against his chest, and his heartaches for his brother. In that moment, Sam’s feelings overwhelm him. He wants to change the way his father sees and acts towards Dean. Though he is not sure how John would take that, or even how Dean would react to his father finally respecting his own needs and wants. Sam wants to beat it into his father that Dean is worthy of all the things John wants for Sam.  
  
  
Dean’s sobs get stronger and he tries to get away from Sam’s grasp, but Sam holds him firmly against his chest. Sam holds him until he feels a shift in Dean’s weight and realizes that his brother no longer has control over his body and collapses against Sam. The force of it brings Sam down to the floor, and he carries Dean with him until he cradles Dean in his lap and against his chest.  
  
  
“Why? Why does he hate me so much? I would never make you leave, Sammy.” Dean tells Sam through his sobs and heartbreak.  
  
  
“I don’t know, Dean. I know you would never do anything to make me leave.” Sam pauses to gather his thoughts. There might never be a better time to get through to his brother. “Dean, you’re a strong, a confident, and a caring person that deserves so much more in life than what you get in return. You… you mean the world to me, Dean, and I will protect you like you protect me. But you need to let me in.” Sam tells him with the love and strength that he feels pulsing through his large frame.  
  
  
Dean cries on his chest and Sam rocks him back and forth on the floor of the motel. It’s the first time Sam can remember ever seeing Dean this upset and vulnerable. It breaks something inside of him, something that can only be fixed by helping Dean discover his true potential, and be the man he was always meant to be.  
  
  
Once Dean falls asleep in Sam’s arms, he lowers himself completely onto the floor. Rolling Dean onto his side, Sam pillows Dean’s head against his chest. It’s been a long time since they shared a bed, the last time Sam can remember is when Dean held him after a nightmare he had when he was younger. Finally Sam is able to return the favor, for once in his life. He has the opportunity to try to tell his big brother that he is a person worthy of love. Dean deserves to have a life outside of the family business, but trying to explain that to Dean will be quite the challenge. Sam only hopes that tonight something got through to his brother.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Sam lays there with his brother on top of him sound asleep. The exhaustion leaves Dean’s body as he enters a deep sleep. Sam can’t imagine the emotional pain Dean is going through. He wonders if his brother will ever get over it, if he’ll be able to move on, no matter what their life will bring to them.  
  
  
Sam wraps the comforter around them, a pillow lands on Dean’s legs in the process. Grasping the pillow, Sam settles it behind his head to be more comfortable on the cold hard floor of the motel. Finally he can close his eyes.  
  
  
 _Sam feels out of place as he is seated at the small table without his laptop and newspaper articles littering his sight for their next hunt. This is his Dad’s room and this must be his dream, but he feels the muscles stretching over his bones and the neat facial hair on his face. Shit! He is John. Well, not really, but Sam is seeing his father’s dream through his father’s eyes.  
  
  
Dean left about a half hour ago to pick up some much needed medical supplies, and food for dinner. It shouldn’t take his son much time to return back to the motel.   
  
  
About an hour after Dean should have been back, there is a noise of the door creeps open. Dean juggles with the bags of supplies in one hand, while the other holds, what John assumes to be their dinner. Dean kicks the door closed, before placing the bags on the floor near the small table to avoid the articles of newspaper cluttering it.  
  
  
Dean looks up at John and stands there like a deer caught in headlights. Eyes wide and frozen in place.  
  
  
“Dean, what took you so long?” John growls.  
  
  
“Umm…I had a hard time finding some of the supplies. Sorry, Dad.” Dean tells him before looking down at his shoes, ready, waits for the disappointment to come.   
  
  
“You should have called. I’ve been waiting for your goddamn ass to get back. I found us a case.” Annoyance and disgust are lacing John’s voice. Why can’t Dean make a damn phone call?  
  
  
“I’m – I’m sorry, Dad. Next time I’ll call. I never meant to be late.” Dean pleads with his father, resentment in his eyes.  
  
  
“Next time is right, Dean! My God! Are you that dumb?” John mocks him, crowding into his space, making Dean, shrink back into the door as his father’s frame looms over him.  
  
  
“N – No! I lost track of time. I’ll remember for next time.” Dean whispers still avoiding Sam’s – John’s – gaze.  
  
  
“I’ll make sure you remember. Dean, look at me, you useless piece of shit.” He slams his hand into the door by the side of Dean’s head making Dean flinch even though he tries to hide it. A nasty grin curves John’s lips. “Why do I keep you with me? Huh? You’re worthless.” He pauses, basking in the guilt and shame radiating from Dean. “Oh yeah, you’re my soldier.” John rasps sarcastically at his son.  
  
  
“What are you, Dean?”  
  
  
Dean hesitantly lifts his head and meets John’s gaze. The fear seeps out of Dean and he responds in a manner that is pure sweetness.  
  
  
“I’m your soldier and I must follow your orders, Sir.” He sighs and takes a deep breath in, letting it out before continuing. “My role is to do what you ask me to do and never question them. Be a good soldier. If not – not – I shall be punished.” Dean pushes it out and shakily unbuttons his jeans and slides them down towards his ankles. He must be commando at all times.  
  
  
“That’s right Dean. And you didn’t follow a rule. You will be punished.” John says matter of flatly and sneers seeing the fear heighten in his son.  
  
  
John pulls his fist back and punches Dean in the face. Dean recoils and John sweeps his legs out from under him. Dean takes a fall and lands hard on the wooden floor as the wind is knocked out of him. Dean tries to get up, but John launches himself on top of Dean, straddling his waist.  
  
  
Dean looks up at him with tears filling his eyes, not yet leaving to roll down his reddened cheek. His lip is split open and John slaps his son’s face to open the cut more. The tears start rolling as he whimpers, “Stop, I’m sorry.”  
  
  
It fuels John more and his palm strikes Dean’s solar plexus multiple times, listening to the whimpers escaping his son’s broken lips. Dean writhes in pain and tries to cover the injuries with his right arm that gotten lose from John’s grasp.  
  
  
John sees his arm move and knows where it’s heading. He grabs Dean’s wrist and squeezes as hard as he can. Dean screams out in pain and bucks his hips trying to get his father off of him.  
  
  
“Dad! Stop! I’m sorry! It’ll never happen again!” Dean shouts and tries to move his hand again.  
  
  
But John just tightens his hold and lifts it up, only to slam it into the floor beneath them. Dean shouts out and struggles to get loose as John smirks down at his son.  
  
  
“What’s the matter, Dean? Can’t fight me like when we are training, huh? Now it’s my turn to show you what I can really do.” John’s expression darkens as he watches the fear pulse through Dean.  
  
  
John cranks his arm down towards Dean’s shoulder while twisting it roughly and the sound of “pop” and “fuck” punctuating the screams of pain from Dean. Using one hand, John keeps Dean’s arm in position, and with his other he begins to punch his gut until his son can no longer breathe. He gets off his son’s body and pulls the arm he knows is broken to flip Dean over onto his stomach. The arm stays twisted brokenly on his back even as Dean continues to shout and scream in agony. Dean tries to kick out, but John easily evades it before kicking back at his son’s broken body. His foot lands heavily on Dean’s stomach until he slams his large booted foot against his head and knocks his son unconscious.  
  
  
John stands up and picks his son’s limp form off the ground and slams it onto one of the beds. Dean’s face is bloody and his lip is split wide open. It will need stitches though John will wait until morning to fix that. A pleased smile reaches John’s face, as he stares at the broken man before him. Dean has been antsy and distracted ever since his brother took off for no reason. John isn’t willing to lose another son, he needs his soldier to stay.   
  
  
John strides over to the mini fridge and pulls out a beer. Twisting the cap off and taking a sip of the bitter ale. He swipes his blood-stained hands off on a towel, grabs his meal from the bag, and gets back to his research._  
  
  
Sam bolts up-right, residual fear pulses beneath his skin. The images of Dean are still behind his eyes and he whimpers before turning towards Dean who is laying on the floor and sleeping, wrapped within the comforter. Sam needs to check to see his injuries. Shuffling close, Sam stares at his brother. Dean’s face is filled with freckles and there is a touch of pink on his cheeks. Except for his black eye, his face is in perfect condition: he was never beaten to a pulp. He places his fingers against Dean’s neck to check for a pulse and its calm beat soothes Sam. Oh thank God! Sam never beat the shit out of Dean. In his dreams that felt so real, it felt as if Sam hurt his brother for not following orders, punishing him for not following them at any cost.  
  
  
Sam runs to the bathroom and vomits into the toilet.   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **John’s POV**  
  
  
Down the hall from the boys, John lays on the bed, hands tucked behind his head. The television is on and turned down low on some action movie. The ceiling fan rattles on high and his beer sits on the end table with a small lamp and clock upon it.  
  
  
John drowns the rest of his beer and gets comfortable on the bed, short enough, that his feet hang off. Sam has the same problem, takes after John with his height; while Dean…his oldest is much more like Mary, the love of his life.   
  
  
His thoughts take a darker turn as he thinks of Mary. They had a plan, a future, and it was taken away by the yellow-eyed demon that had plans for Sam. When he’s not consumed with his thoughts of revenge, he wonders about those plans. He has no idea what they are, but them seem to include Dean. It’s with a heavy heart that he realizes the boys will need to discover it on their own.  
  
  
Deep down John is disgusted by the thought of his boys being more than brothers (based on their interactions and closeness), but with their life, it’s not that far from the truth. Thinking about it (and wishing he wasn’t) he comes to the conclusion that Sam would be the one to have more than brotherly feelings for Dean, since his oldest took care of Sam and gave him what he needed when John couldn’t. Though if Dean let someone into his heart, that person would be Sam. Sam already belongs there; it’s only a matter of time until Dean opens up and sees what is right in front of him. Someone who loves him unconditionally.  
  
  
John focuses on the rattling of the ceiling fan and the soft hum of the television lulls him to sleep.  
  
  
 _John feels out of place in the motel room, sitting at the table waiting for the person he picked up at the bar. Once he sees the motel door opening, he’s on his feet in a flash, slamming the body against the wall. Beneath him are the strong, hard lines of a man. A man, what the hell, no way. Who the hell is this? Raking his hand across his face and the feel of smooth skin makes his heart race. The added height and long, shaggy brown hair falling into his face, John knows. He’s his son, he is Sam.  
  
  
Sam slams his lips upon the man and hears the moans escaping into his mouth. He can feel the man’s erection against his hip locked in confines of his denim. Sam pushes his hips forward and a hiss of excitement escapes his lips, the need of feeling a man against him since he will never have Dean. This is what he needs and wants.  
  
  
Sam wastes no time in taking the man’s flannel shirt, unbuttoning until he is able to push it off the guy’s lean shoulders. He lifts the hem of the undershirt, ripping it up and over the man’s head. The man’s breathing quickens with excitement and anticipation for more. It sends an electric shock through Sam’s body as he places his large palm on the man’s beating heart, lowering his hand to trace the curves of his abdominal muscles. There is a hitch of the guys breathe when John releases the buckle of his belt.   
  
  
“S – S – Sam.” The voice whispers with lust and nerves.  
  
  
John (Sam) stops, hands holding the opened buckle, and hesitantly looks up, “D – Dean. Is that you?” Sam asks, knowing all too well, it is.  
  
  
“Ye – Yeah Sam. What – What are you? What are w – we doing?” Dean asks nervously and slightly scared.   
  
  
Sam fully takes in his brother’s appearance. His body has gone rigid, his face is pinched and turned away, even as his eyes flicker a cross between fear and want. Sam’s eyes narrow as Dean, turns to look at him, but unable to meet his gaze, anxiously waiting for an answer.  
  
  
“D – Dean. I need you. I need to be with you, man – to fill this ache in my chest. I won’t hurt you and I will take care of you. I – I just need.” Sam answers his brother, honestly, displaying his vulnerability. Sam hopes that Dean understands why he needs to be with Dean.  
  
  
John (Sam) continues to pull open the belt through the loops, letting it fall to the floor. He uses his thumb to release the button and slowly pulls the zipper down. Sam realizes his brother is flaccid within his jeans. He wants to change that quite quickly because this could be his only chance. Sam wants to pleasure his brother as much as he wants to pleasure himself though his heart aches at what he will be taking from Dean. He is fulfilling a need and using his brother to achieve this goal, even if it’s what he wants for them.  
  
  
Dean gasps and stiffens his body as he realizes what will happen. His head slams back against the wall, showing his submission to his brother’s wants and needs. Despite his willingness, he is clearly unsure of what this hidden secret means.  
  
  
John (Sam’s) hand slip beneath the waistband of Dean’s boxers and jeans. He slides them down his bowed legs letting them pool at his feet. Dean shivers and his breathing gets raspy as he confirms that something is really going to happen. Sam leans forward and capture’s Dean’s lips in a chaste kiss as he brings his hands around to cup his brother’s round globes of flesh. Dean steps out of his clothing and hesitantly follows as Sam deepens the kiss and moves them closer to the bed.  
  
  
Sam turns them around until he pushes Dean down onto the bed with a glint in his eyes that is pure lust.  
  
  
Sam crawls up onto the bed and his gaze is locked with Dean’s. Dean’s eyes reflect his lust, although there is also fear shining through unshed tears. Ignoring that, Sam wastes no time in claiming his brother’s lips in a hungry kiss.  
  
  
Sam can hear the slight whimpers, and he grinds down to show Dean how much he is wanted and needed at the moment. The confusion on Dean’s face is clearly understandable when Sam can feel his brother’s cock begin to swell and harden at the motion and intimate touch.  
  
  
Sam deepens the kiss and pulls his flannel shirt wide open, buttons flying around the room. Sam kisses along his jawline as he makes his way towards the back of Dean’s ear. The unexpected moan of pleasure puts him on hold, gently trailing his hand down his brother’s firm chest towards his impressive cock.   
  
  
Dean has his eyes shut tight and heat upon his skin. The tense lines his face and chest reflect the unwilling pleasure of being with a man, not necessarily his brother. Sam slowly, gently, rests his hand at the bottom of Dean’s belly, at the start of the trail of blonde pubic hair. The hitch in Dean’s breath catches Sam’s attention as he looks up to see his pupils blown with lust though his eyes don’t see anything.   
  
  
Sam laps at a hard nub and slowly wraps his large palm around Dean’s heavy, thick cock. He marvels at the way, it is standing to attention in his brother’s presence. Sam strokes his brother’s cock up and down with a twist at the head, leaking pre-come to ease the way down.   
  
  
Sucking and biting at Dean’s nipples combined with the feel of Sam’s hand, pulls whines and whimpers from Dean’s throat. Encouraged, Sam moves further down Dean’s lean body. Sam takes the moment to admire his brother’s thick, hard cock, and the thick vein dominating the underside of his cock.  
  
  
John (Sam) kisses the head and licks at the gathering pre-come. Dean moans out loud and whispers, “Oh God.”   
  
  
Sam wraps his lips around the awaiting cock and smiles at the weight in his mouth. He sucks and licks and moves his head forward until he can feel it in the back of his throat. The stiffness and tension radiating off of Dean’s body and the arching off the bed as he comes down his waiting throat, screaming “Sammy.”  
  
  
Sam cleans him up and lays down beside his brother. Dean turned over with his back facing him, an embarrassed flush covering his body. Sam has just helped Dean discover something hidden; a love for Sam that goes deep within his soul._  
  
  
John bolts upright, gasping for air. He races towards the bathroom to release the bile that is rising up his throat. Clinging to the porcelain god, he throws up until he is dry heaving over the bowl. The very thought of fucking his own son makes him sick to his stomach.  
  
  
John has never thought about being with a man ever in his life. When Mary passed away he looked for random ladies in the bars he found for relaxation from the nights hunt. He needed a way to ease the adrenaline that would pulse thickly in his veins at every hunt he went on, with or without his sons. John could find solace in the warm body of a woman and fuck her in the truck, the alley way behind the bar, and at times the motel room.   
  
  
John sits there beside the toilet and leaning back against the old-fashioned tub resting on four white paws. He breaths in and out, trying to get his composure back and think clearly about what happened in his dream.   
  
  
A hidden desire for men? A need to satisfy himself with the likeness of his Mary with his son? Shit! Could it be true? He pushes himself up on his feet and wobbles towards the sink. He stands there just letting the water run and the steam rise within the air fogging up the mirror in front of him. When he can move again he rests his palm against the glass before swiping his hand across the mirror to see his complete face reflecting back at him.  
  
  
John stares at himself, brown eyes and dark circles looking back at him. John stares at himself in the mirror and looks for an answer regarding the dream that just freaked the shit out of him. God, he needed a woman’s body to get the disgusting clammy feel of being sexually intimate with his son. It had felt so real that the smell of sex was still heavy in the air.   
  
  
Why had he dreamed that? Did he harbor some unknown attraction to men? He gave a decisive shake of his head. No, he knew himself. He was completely straight and was in love with women. No men for him, but the dream… it hadn’t lied. He knew in his blood that Dean, his Dean was into men, not just anyone: Sam, his Sammy.  
  
  
God, what the hell did he do to his kids? He is shaking and shivering in his boxer shorts, so caught up in his guilt that he gets spooked when the door of his motel is slammed open and Sam is standing there in the bathroom doorway, breathing sharply from running. Any embarrassment he feels at getting caught in his boxers fades as he looks at his son. Sam looks like he feels and there is a look of acknowledgement on his son’s face.  
  
  
“Dad? I – I had this…I don’t even know what to call it.” Sam says through shivering of clattered teeth.   
  
  
“Sam. Sit down. I think I know what’s going on. Shit! I should have said something.” John says looking at Sam and scrubbing a hand across his face.  
  
  
“What should you have said, Dad?” Sam is hesitant, concern etched on his face.  
  
  
“Son, before I knew it, I – I touch a piece of the skin I got from the Captain. If I knew… fuck! If I knew I wouldn’t have touched it in the first place.” John says, defeated. This is his fault, due to his carelessness.  
  
  
“Dad, we have to figure it out. I – I don’t know if I can look at Dean without seeing that nightmare. I need to find out who this person or creature is now!”   
  
  
“I know – I know. I don’t think I can either. But the next dream we have can help us. Next time we can be aware and know it’s a nightmare.” John states firmly with a nod.   
  
  
“Okay Dad. Okay. Meet you at the diner for dinner? Dean and I will do some research and some interviews.” Sam doesn’t wait for an answer as he walks out of the room.  
  
  
“I’ll meet you at the diner.” John calls back.  
  
  
John takes a quick shower and gets dressed quickly to meet up with his boys. God help him, it’s going to be hard to look his oldest son with the thoughts of his damn nightmare. He only hopes that Dean doesn’t figure it out and is too focused on the hunt to recognize the odd behaviors from himself or Sam. 


	7. Chapter Seven

**Chapter Seven**  
  
 **Dean’s POV**  
  
  
Dean wakes up and sits on the edge of the bed, eyes wide open as he stares at the empty bed next to him. Where did Sam go? Did he leave again? Or did he go see Dad?  
  
  
He has no idea what is going on with Sam, but his gut feeling is that it has to do with this case. Getting to his feet Dean heads towards the bathroom. He washes up, but the usual relaxing ritual is marred by thoughts of Sam.  
  
  
When Dean sees Sam hasn’t returned, his heart starts beating erratically. It’s stupid and he can’t help it: so much of his identity is dedicated to the safety and protection of Sam. Dean knows deep within his heart that he could never protect Sam completely, but he will still die trying to protect him from the creatures that plague the earth in the darkness.  
  
  
Knowing he can’t do anything about Sam, Dean takes a chance and heads towards the police station wanting to speak with the Captain. If he’s there, Dean can hopefully gain more insight into this creature, more specifically this piece of skin found by the victims.  
  
  
Thinking about what Sam and Dad have said, Dean, feels in his bones that there is more to this creature that either of them is telling him. He might not be the greatest when it comes to research, but he is capable of looking for valuable information for a hunt. Dean’s best features are in his interviewing skills. He works the charm while staying calm and collected when trying to gain information on a case. He’d never say, but he’s proud of that skill.  
  
  
Dean walks the eight blocks down the street to the police station. The sun is up and bright. The heat beats down on his back makes the sweat pour down his back, pooling beneath the leather of his jacket.  
  
  
He wishes he felt cooler as he enters the police station. But he gives himself a moment before heading towards the intercom.  
  
  
“Good morning, this is Agent Bates. I’m here to see Captain Johnson.” Dean states through the intercom.  
  
  
“Agent Bates - Come on in, the Captain is waiting for you.”  
  
  
Dean hears the click of the door and pulls it open. An officer greets him and takes him straight to the Captain’s office. Dean nods his thanks, before turning to the door. Taking a deep breath, he steadies himself before knocking. And then he waits.  
  
  
“Come on in.” A voice says.  
  
  
Dean opens the door and walks into the office and walks up towards the Captain, ready to ask his questions.  
  
  
“Hello. I’m Agent Bates. I’m here to find out more about that bat creature case.” Dean walks towards Johnson with his hand out waiting to be received and shaken.  
  
  
Captain Johnson reaches out and shakes Dean’s hand in greeting and nods.  
  
  
“Nice to meet you, Agent Bates.” The Captain is obviously a busy man. He wastes no time getting down to business. “The skin from the creature is bat-like: tough and smooth. Our experts guess it comes from its wing, although the skin is very similar to human skin. And, of course, the pigments of the skin are black and red.”  
  
  
“Human skin: black and red human skin, sir?” Dean asks.  
  
  
Captain Johnson shrugs, not willing to give a definite answer. “A piece of the skin that was found at each site next to the victim was analyzed. In all cases, the results were closely related to human skin.”  
  
  
“A human: that can possibly change shape.” Dean tries to make it a question, but really there is no doubt. “Is there anything else you can tell me about the case?” He asks curiously. Already it’s been worth the trip. He wasn’t expecting to find out this skin is human.  
  
  
“Yeah, there was one more thing. One of the relatives from our latest victim said that they saw this man in their dreams and when the man left, it looked like a bat, like Dracula.” The Captain’s voice conveys his skepticism.  
  
  
“Like Dracula, thank you for the information Captain.” Dean tells the Captain and walks out to go to the library.  
  
  
It is still fairly early in the morning, not yet 9 o’clock. The library won’t be open so Dean takes his time ambling down the street. He pauses and pulls his cell phone from his pocket and check to see if he has any messages: nothing. Dean shakes his head and mutters under his breath. Neither Dad nor Sam is anywhere to be found and Dean has to do more research. Great! At this point all he knows is the creature is human and can turn into a bat – wing liked creature. It has to be a God or Spirit of some sort but mostly related to dreams and nightmares. It would still be nice to share the information with his family.  
  
  
Dean heads towards the library and finds the computers quickly. He sits at a station and opens google. Typing in his search for  _Gods and Spirts for dreams and nightmares_ , the results blow his mind away.  
  
  
Dean’s deep into his reading when his cell phone starts vibrating in his pocket. Pulling it out he sees Sam’s name written on the screen.  
  
  
“Hey! What’s up? Where did you go this morning?” He can’t help his concern.  
  
  
“Hi. Sorry about that. I had to talk with Dad about something.” Sam says matter of flatly.  
  
  
“Is everything okay?” Dean can’t help asking even though he knows Sam isn’t going to tell him. “Cause I think I found something or someone.”  
  
  
“Everything is fine, Dean. It was about the hunt. You found the creature?” Sam squeals out in delight.  
  
  
“Yeah – I think so. I’m at the library. I’ll just print the information out. Breakfast, dude?”  
  
  
“Yeah – meet us at the diner.” Sam tells Dean.  
  
  
Dean prints out the pages about the Spirits of Morpheus and Epiales. They were the spirits of dreams and nightmares, and they’re brothers. Knowing which spirit it is doesn’t help if they don’t know what person it inhabits. Dean can only hope that they will discover who it is since none of them have touched the piece of skin. The skin is the key, and they need to find out who the next victim is, stopping these murderous spirits in their tracks.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Entering the diner, Dean looks around and notices that Dad and Sam are in a booth towards the back. Dean walks over to them and slides in next to Sammy, bumping into his shoulder in the process.  
  
  
“Jerk.” Sam says with a grin on his face.  
  
  
“Bitch.”  
  
  
“Dean, Sam said you found some information about the creature?” John asks but avoids eye contact, which is unusual for his father.  
  
  
“Yeah – Dad. I found out that there is a Spirit of Dreams called Morpheus and a Spirit of Nightmares called Epiales. They are brothers. It seems they can change into a dark-winged creature once they implant their dream or nightmare into the persons mind.” Dean can’t help but state his findings proudly.  
  
  
“A spirit of dreams and nightmares. Okay, so how does this implant thing work?” Sam asks while looking at their father.   
  
  
A light switch turns on in his head, but Dean doesn’t say anything. He just watches more closely.  
  
  
“When a person is dreaming, the spirit implants a message through touch to be released to the subconscious. This then plays back the dream or nightmare while you are sleeping. And most victims don’t realize the creature is part of the dream or nightmare to start with because the victim is so focused on the horrible nightmare.” Dean says.  
  
  
“What?” John yells across the table.  
  
  
“The creature reveals themselves before the person wakes up in human form and leaves in the dark-winged form.” Dean states confidently. Everything he read said this.  
  
  
“Is there any more information about these creatures?” Sam asks hesitantly.  
  
  
Dean can sense something is wrong with his father and brother. It sounds like one of them has touched the skin. Who? Most likely Dad since he had a piece of skin from the Captain. He doesn’t want to let on that he figured it out, but he’s curious all the same.  
  
  
“Yeah – Epiales is the creature of nightmares. His skin is black and red, his eyes are red. The Captain said a relative of one of the victims saw the man in his dreams and said he is tall and muscular with dark-brown eyes, black – shoulder length hair, high cheek bones with thick red lips. The man is very witty and charismatic.” Dean shares with them.  
  
  
“Okay. That’s great, Dean. A good description of the man. It should help us to find and kill him.” John says looking at his hands and not at Dean.  
  
  
“How do we kill it, Dean?” Sam asks and John looks up with wide eyes and barely there nod towards Sam.  
  
  
“Fire. Like a flare gun. It’s very similar to a Wendigo.” Dean says and grins. He loves using fire to kill his prey.  
  
  
But that is as much information as Dean has. Now that he does know, his attitude changes.  
  
  
“How will we find it Sam? Dad?” Dean asks lowering his gaze to his hands.  
  
  
“Umm…through a dream or nightmare. Maybe we should touch the piece of skin?” Sam says and stares at their father, obviously willing him, to go along with a plan that he has no idea about.  
  
  
They are both acting unusual and neither of them will meet his gaze. It makes Dean’s insides twist and turn until he is nauseous. Something is wrong and they won’t trust him.  
  
  
“I think that’s a great plan, Sam. I still have the piece of skin and I can touch it and look for the creature in my dreams.” John states calmly, glances up at Dean rather than his hands, the table, or at Sam.  
  
  
“I think that’s a plan. But, Dad, you sure this is the best we’ve got?” Sam says, biting his bottom lip.  
  
  
“Yeah – Sam. I think it is. We have all the information we need. All because of Dean.” John says looking at Dean.   
  
  
“Okay. We’ve got a plan. Be aware of your dreams tonight. Be on the lookout.” Dean says, lowering his lashes as he takes in the appearance of his father and brother. Both are breathing fast and nervous about what is to come.  
  
  
“It’s going to be okay. Everything will be fine. All I dream about is beer, burgers, and girls.” Dean says with a laugh to lighten the mood.  
  
  
“And pie!” Sam adds.  
  
  
They laugh together and the tension floating in the air dissipates. They are able to relax and enjoy their lunch. Dean smiles to himself, happy at being the peacemaker and relaxing his family members before the secret is out. Dean knows that John and Sam has already experienced their first dream and are completely freaked out about what they saw in those dreams. Well, they’re not dreams are they? They’re nightmares, to be honest.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Dean takes a shot and asks Sam to go see a movie, since their hunt doesn’t begin until the sun fades and the stars sparkle bright in the night sky.  
  
  
Surprisingly, Sam accepts the invitation to the movies. It’s a small town, so there isn’t much choice. They bicker until they decide on Lethal Weapon. It’s a classic that they have seen multiple times in their motel room on the crappy televisions, but never on the big screen.  
  
  
Dean encourages Sam to head into the theater to find them some seats. He hopes Sam picks somewhere towards the back. He hates the front and enjoys watching others while he is able to sit back and relax and enjoy some quality time with his pain in the ass little brother that is not so little anymore.  
  
  
Dean grabs them a large tub of popcorn and drizzles a good amount of salt and butter on the fluffy white kernels. Two large blue raspberry slushy’s, a bag of peanut M&M’s and licorice for Sam make up his snack haul.   
  
  
He enters the theater and finds Sam in the back. Thank God! Relief washes over him and he sees Sam’s face light up with a mirrored smile. The small flutter of butterfly wings can be felt in his stomach. Dean is nervous, and the thought stops him in his tracks. Why is he nervous?  
  
  
Rather than think about it, Dean covers his unease and stares unashamed at Sam. His brother is taller than him now and he hides his annoyance of being the shortest with a smirk, all the while eyeing his brother. Sam’s brown hair reaches his shoulders and is tucked neatly behind his ears. The glint in his hazel eyes is warm, and they crinkle when he grins from ear to ear. Dean’s heart flutters in his chest. Shit! It’s the same feelings he has when he looks for a girl. Fuck! Dean’s nervous because he likes Sam.  
  
  
Sam waits for him, concern etched on his face. He can clearly read what Sam is thinking even without him voicing it. Always the big brother, Dean, nods towards Sam in reassurance, smiling when his brother relaxes. He takes the steps up towards the back of the stadium theater and plops down next to Sam. Popcorn flies out from the bag and lands in Sam’s waiting lap. Sam chuckles beside him and leans over to whisper in his ear, “Eager much, Dean.” Sam brushes the kernels onto the floor.  
  
  
The lights fade and they watch the movie in comfortable silence. Legs splay and thighs press together, even their feet touch. It feels natural – an everyday thing between them. Dean’s heart races and sweat pools on the back of his neck. Why is this making him nervous?  
  
  
He takes a few deep breaths, feeling the simple ease and closeness between them. This has him moving his hand towards Sam’s. He wants to entwine their fingers together like a puzzle and never let go.  
  
  
Dean jumps when Sam joins their fingers and squeezes gently. As if reassuring him not to freak out, which is unlike Sam to say the least.  
  
  
They watch the rest of the movie hand in hand, just enjoying the simple pleasure of being with one another. Dean looks over at Sam when the credits roll and his eye lids are at half-mast. It’s time to take him home.   
  
  
“Let’s get out of here Sammy.” He smiles and pulls his brother up. They walk back to the car, holding hands along the way. It’s been a long time since they clasped hands in this fashion. Sammy was a small boy, looking for his brother for comfort. Dean releases the hold and stands there not sure what to do.  
  
  
Sam bumps his shoulder and looks at him with a questioning look.  
  
  
“Dean?” He asks.  
  
  
“I’m fine Sammy. Let’s get out of here.” Dean tells Sam.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Back at the motel, they each take a shower and head to bed.  
  
  
Sam goes to the bed closest to the bathroom. He pulls the golden-yellow comforter down and crawls in. Laying down, he pulls the blankets under his chin before tucking his hands under his head. It’s not long before his eyes droop shut.  
  
  
Dean sits on the edge of the bed watching his brother ever so closely. His gaze follows every move he makes while entering his bed. Dean waits for the easy breaths of his brother to snatch Sam’s laptop up from the floor and start it up.  
  
  
There’s one piece of information he keeps locked away. Hoping it will be of use in the future.   
  
  
Even though he’d kept his attention on the Captain, a photograph on the Captain’s desk had caught his eye. A picture of the Captain and what looks like his brother, a paramedic. What caught Dean’s attention was the bright blue eyes on the Captain’s brother, and the slight redness of the Captain’s eyes.  
  
  
Both men were tall and had high cheek bones. One brother had black, shoulder length hair, while the other had blonde, short spiky hair. Captain Johnson had brown eyes with a touch of red to them, where his brother had piercing blue eyes. They were both muscular and their uniforms fit them like a second skin.   
  
  
Dean had to admit, these men were attractive. Only to himself. He would never be able to express that thought out loud to his family. He had too much fear of being judged and no longer a true man. If his father ever saw him as a man.  
  
  
With Sam asleep, Dean continues his research on Morpheus and Epiales. The spirits of dreams and nightmares. Brothers. Dean has to admit that these men do their job well, like his family does well with hunting.  
  
  
Since they’ve come here, Dean’s dreams have been filled with pleasures of his wants and desires. It’s…confronting, as Dean realized he most likely would never take the time to go after what he truly wants out of life. These dreams have given him a new outlook of having his wants and desires at his fingertips. Achieving them… he finds even the thought difficult.  
  
  
He looks at his brother in awe, sleeping peacefully and having dreams that may be a gateway to solving this case. Dean shivers at the thought of what is going on in his brother’s mind. Was it Morpheus or Epiales?  
  
  
Morpheus enters a person’s subconscious radiating a bright blue light by giving the person a dream of their wants and desires. He would speak slowly and charmingly with the person he was about to give a dream too. Morpheus’s voice would ease and comfort the person, and they would accept the dream and sleep in peace before waking up content and satisfied.  
  
  
Epiales, on the other hand, enters the victim’s subconscious, blinding the victim with a red light. He used his charm and wit to gain the trust of his victims allowing him to turn their dreams into nightmares. His victims would wake up in a cold sweat and unnerved to the core of their being.  
  
  
Dean sighs at the thought of what Sam and his Dad could be going through with these dreams and nightmares. He scrubs his hand over his face and heads to the sink. Dean splashes cold water over his tired face and fills the glass cup with water, downing it in one gulp.   
  
  
He creeps to his bed near the door and pulls back the comforter. Lowering himself onto the mattress, Dean whispers to his brother, “Good night, Sammy. Sweet dreams.”  
  
  
Rolling over to his stomach, his right hand grasps the blade hidden beneath the pillow. Feeling more secure, Dean falls asleep to the content, rhythmic breathing from his brother.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Chapter Eight**  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
Sam goes to bed after taking a well-needed shower. He went over the information Dean gave them, and quite impressed with his brother’s skills.  
  
  
Learning that his dream was brought on by Epiales, the spirit of nightmares, Sam is nervous about going to sleep, even though Dean is right there next to him, with his silver blade hidden beneath his pillow.  
  
  
Despite his nervousness, he thinks back to the movie theater holding hands with Dean and it doesn’t take long once he lays back and gets comfortable in bed. Hands behind his head and Dean there means that there is safety flying in the air around him. Slowly his eyes drift closed and he falls soundly sleep.  
  
  
 _Sam can see Dean kneeling on the ground with his hands tied behind his back. His hand grabs at Dean’s shirt, pulling him to his feet. He can feel Dean, shudder in his grasp and fear is shining clear in his green eyes. The eyes to his soul, the eyes that express his emotions, the eyes that can never lie or hide how Dean is truly feeling; his eyes talk and tell a story Sam can understand._  
  
  
Sam holds him in place and looks around. He stops when his eyes connect with the mirror hanging above the desk in the hotel room. Through the mirror, he sees the whole room and knows that they’ve never stopped here when looking for a place to stay when hunting.   
  
  
As Dean takes a step back he catches a glimpse of the scruff on his father’s face, and anger races through his body and overwhelms him. The fact that he essentially is his father angers him more than he can take. Sam would have rather switched dreams, or in this case nightmares, with his brother.  
  
  
Watching porn or watching his brother in action is better than hurting Dean. It makes his stomach turn as the bile boils in his gut. The thought of his Dad hurting his son in this manner is too much, and the bile makes a sudden appearance and lands forcefully on the floor.  
  
  
In that moment, Sam catches sight of a dark, winged person in the window behind him. Epiales stares amusedly at Sam, who is caught staring at bright, red eyes locking onto hazel ones. Sam gasps at the sight, knowing full well this is their creature, the spirit of nightmares.  
  
  
“Epiales? What do you want?” Sam asks confidently, even though he can feel the tremors rack his father’s body.  
  
  
“Hello there, Sam.” Epiales said with a mischievous smirk on his face.  
  
  
“How do you know who I am?” Sam questions the creature.  
  
  
“Well, you are a Winchester. And I’ve met your father. And I’ve met Dean. That only left you… How lucky I was that you and your father were such easy targets. I didn’t even have to trick him when he touched my skin.” He says with glee.  
  
  
“It this a joke to you? A game? Do you think it is fun messing with people’s minds? Sam can’t keep the disgust from his voice.  
  
  
“Of course it’s fun. You mean you don’t think so, Sam? Isn’t that what dreams are for? To have the fun, you can’t have in reality. Or do you actually think your dreams will ever be fulfilled?” Epiales states.  
  
  
“It’s not fun at all. I – I do hope to have my dreams fulfilled. I don’t want to hurt him. What I want is nothing like what you are doing. All you do is bring death and have fun with innocent people.” Sam spits out.  
  
  
“All in due time, Sam, all in due time. Still, I don’t blame you for being interested in your brother. He is something special, isn’t he? And I must say, Dean is the only one who has seen myself and brother in human form.” Epiales tells him with pleasure which turns to slight panic as the air in the room shifts.  
  
  
Sam turns towards the door of their room and standing there is Morpheus. Bright blue light shines in his eyes, as Morpheus speaks with his brother.  
  
  
“Stop this now, Epiales! Stop this feud we have going on. It’s stupid and over something neither one of us can control. You might be the spirit of nightmares, but you’ve never hurt people like this before. The nightmares you give to people are to help them overcome their struggles not cause death.” I can’t believe you would do it to get back at me. I never betrayed your trust. You’re my brother, Epiales. I’ve only ever wanted the best for you, and now I want to have my brother back.” Morpheus reasons with his brother.  
  
  
“How do I know you’re telling the truth, brother? We used to work together. Helping those in need and supporting those to go after their desires and wants in life. My nightmares showed them the obstacles they would face at achieving their hearts desires while your dreams showed them their hearts desires.”  
  
  
Silence fills the room until Epiales speaks once more. “We were a team… a great team. But how can I know I can trust you again?” Even Sam can hear the hope in his voice. Epiales wants this.  
  
  
“By starting now. By working with me. Help me put their dreams back in order, brother. Let Sam and Dean discover what they know in their hearts.” Morpheus turns a secret smile on Sam. “Even though Sam is the only one to have knowledge of his hearts desires, his brother is not too far off admitting what he truly desires in life.”  
  
  
Epiales takes a moment to think before he simply nods his head in agreement.  
  
  
“Okay, little brother. It’s a deal. I miss you. And our banter. Let’s give the Winchester’s their dreams they desire and hope for. I accept your trust.” He says confidently.  
  
  
The next thing Sam knows is Dean is at his side, hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him awake.  
  
  
“Sam, Sammy. Wake up. It’s only a dream.” He can hear Dean saying.  
  
  
Sam’s eyes flutter open. He takes a look around him and he smiles at Dean. “I’m okay, Dean. I saw the creature. I spoke with him. He said you know who he is.”  
  
  
Dean stills and freezes at his words. He gazes at his brother as the wheels turn and then a light bulb shines bright inside his brother’s mind.  
  
  
Dean nods and takes a breath in and releases it out. “It’s the Captain – Captain Johnson. I caught a glance of red in his eyes when I was interviewing him. At the time, I thought it was nothing or just my imagination.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
The Winchesters meet up at the café and set up a plan on confronting the Captain about the victims.  
  
  
“I can head back to the precinct and follow a fake lead? Dean suggests. Sam thinks only he hears the slight quaver in Dean’s voice.  
  
  
“Is that safe, Dean? Are you sure? It might be out of your league?” John teases with a grin.  
  
  
“It’s safe, Dad. I’ll use the fake lead to take him into the woods. You and Sammy will be waiting for us.” Dean says, full of conviction. He trusts his family can help to stop the spirit.  
  
  
“Tell him you…you were hiking in the woods and heard screaming.” Sam suggests, pausing when their eyes lock on each other. Sam could tell Dean was contemplating whether or not this plan would work. But he also knew that Dean would do the job. Though the way Dean gazed upon Sam… there was something different about it. Something different about Dean. Despite his feat, he was intense and powerful. Sam felt his blood pulse at the hope for Dean to go after his dreams.  
  
  
“I can do it.” To Sam it felt like Dean is talking about more than the trap. “I’ll even add some charm to it.” Dean says as a blush tints his cheeks. It’s a very good look for Dean, Sam must admit.  
  
  
“Okay, Dean, sounds like a plan. Once the creature sees the fake body we have for him, he’ll change form, then Dad and I will close in and shoot flare guns at him.”  
  
  
Sam states confidently, although his mind plays scenarios of what could go wrong. Of what could happen to Dean during this hunt.  
  
“Sounds good, boys. Let’s get down to business and let Dean do his thing.” John says as he gets up and pays the bill. They all head towards the exit, without noticing the handsome blue eyed man watching them from a booth across the café. There is a glint of excitement in his eyes and hope that these gentleman will take care of his brother’s stupid mistake.  
  
  
The look on the young man who offered to charm himself for his older brother would be a sight to see. Though he played his role with confidence, Morpheus can tell this man is nervous and anxious, afraid to make a mistake in front of his family. Though the look he sent his brother was strong and powerful. A look of hope, determination, and love. Love of purity that radiated in body to the beat of his heart. He would do anything for the young man whether he liked it or not. Their love is strong and would never die.  
  
  
If successful in their job, Morpheus has a plan to help the young men towards each other with the help of a dream.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Chapter Nine**  
  
 **Dean’s POV**  
  
  
Dean is scared shitless. He is nervous about charming Captain Johnson, about whether he will be lured away from prying eyes. Dean knows this is the only way to take the creature out, and it all comes down to him. Fuck! No wonder he’s nervous.  
  
  
But it’s not just for himself. He remembers how Sam looked last night. The dream Sam had was excruciating to experience just as an onlooker. Dean can’t imagine how it must feel to the victim, having to overcome the dream. The nightmare.   
  
  
But he couldn’t think about Sammy now. He had a job to do. Dean went to work. He took a shower and put on his dirty clothes, before applying dirt to the tips of his wet hair. He then used the hair dryer to cake the dirt onto his body.  
  
  
Once he finished dressing himself up for their plan, Dean went for a three-mile run. He had to look like he was on a hike.  
  
  
Once he’s as prepared as he can be, Dean leaves the Impala with Sam and jogs up to the police station. Like last time, Dean was buzzed into the precinct and brought right to the Captain.  
  
  
“Captain? I – I have to tell you something.” Dean says, bent over as if winded.  
  
  
He keeps an eye on Captain Johnson, as he walks closer to Dean. There is no hesitation as he places his hand on his shoulder, gently squeezing.  
  
  
“Dean. Calm down. Take a seat.” The Captain says.  
  
  
Dean takes a seat in the chair across from the Captain’s desk. He scrubs his hand over his sweaty face. A shiver runs through his body, and it sets him on edge.  
  
  
“Tell me what happened, Dean?” He asks curiously.  
  
  
Dean takes a moment to calm his breathing and slowly locks eyes with the man in front of him. He looks at him properly and is surprised to find he reminds him of Sam. The long hair, tall and muscular body, and even his wittiness. Is this why he immediately felt comfortable with him? Then it hits Dean like a tornado, the mixed emotions and feelings he has been struggling to deal with towards Sam. They aren’t new. They aren’t due to this spirit. He felt the connection before they headed off to work this case.  
  
  
Despite his feelings, Dean is a good hunter and knows what he need to do. He can’t think about Sam right now, he has a job. Taking in as much air as he can, he lets it out, ready to tell his story. He hopes his timing is right, that Sammy is safe and waiting, ready with backup from Dad.  
  
  
Focus, Dean, he tells himself. Now he needs to play his part and play it well.  
  
  
“I was hiking up this trail to Kezar Falls. It… I must have been close because I could smell the lake in the distance when I heard screaming. I ran towards the sound and when I got there the screaming stopped. It was like it never happened. But then I found a body… a female body torn apart. I think… oh god! I think she was torn about by her own hand!” Dean looks up at the Captain, hands clenched and tears in his eyes. “We have to get her body and bring her home to her family.”  
  
  
“Shit, Dean! It’s like before. Do you know how to get there? Are there more victims?” The Captain asks, and Dean sees a hint of redness in his eyes.  
  
  
“Yeah – I know where it is, I can bring you there. As for more victims,” Dean shakes his head, “not from what I saw. But I didn’t have a good look around.”  
  
  
“Good. Let’s go and see what we can do.”  
  
  
The Captain walks Dean out of the precinct and towards the Captain’s police car. It’s an unmarked police car, and Dean waits while the Captain attaches a single red flasher light to the top of the roof and the blue flashing lights in the rear of the car.  
  
  
Dean takes his seat next to him and buckles up. He doesn’t even give the Captain directions – he drives them straight to the start of the trails.   
  
  
The Captain exits the vehicle while Dean fumbles with the buckle release. Fuck! He can’t let his nerves get the better of him! Finally, he gets it loose and accidently hits the horn in his haste to exit the car. He can see the Captain watching him with intense eyes that are completely red. Dean’s glad to give his family a warning they have arrived, whether the creature likes the plan or not.  
  
  
Dean ignores the glare from the Captain, muttering “It’s this way,” before he starts up the trail he was on earlier. They walk for three miles until they come across the body Dean planted there to begin with. The Captain, frozen to the ground, gasps at the sight.  
  
  
The red of his eyes shine brightly in the dark and suddenly the Captain isn’t there. In his place stands a winged creature. As Dean stares at it, he clutches at his arm, his knees buckle and his head starts to cloud. And before he knows what’s happening in front of him, the winged creature – the Captain – is right over the victim’s body.  
  
  
The creature, lost in his own world begins to eat at the flesh and bones of the victim. Dean is paralyzed and can hear his racing heartbeat in his chest. He wants to do something, should do something, but he is too shocked at the sight before him.  
  
  
He can vaguely hear someone shouting for him to get down. It’s Sammy. As soon as he realizes what he is hearing. Dean dives to the ground and lands hard on his chest, knocking the wind from his body. He can hear gun flares going off and the creature wail and shout.  
  
  
Dean is being dragged away from the body (and how did he get there? He doesn’t remember) and wrapped up in long, strong, muscular arms. It’s Sam. His brother. Dean’s emotions get the best of him and he hugs his brother back, holding on for dear life. He can feel Sam’s heart, racing within his chest, and the rapid pulse running through his own body has him gasping for air.  
  
  
Fighting against his instinct, Sam’s breathing calms. He knows Dean won’t settle until Sam has shown he is sage. Breathing in and out slowly, he encourages Dean to breathe with him. To Dean’s horror, this has him holding onto Sam even tighter.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
As Sam and John wait for Dean and the spirit to arrive, Sam fumes over his brother. Dean risks his life again and again for the hunt and screw the consequences of those actions. Dean decided to be the bait he and his father needed him to be. Bring the Captain and show him the body. At this point, the creature will make its decision on what to do next.  
  
  
Sam was reluctant on this idea, but knows that it will be for the best. And it works in their favor. His Dad gestures towards him, and Sam readies himself. He sees Dean bring the Captain, to the body, and right there the Captain changes into the winged-creature.  
  
  
Sam spares a glance for his brother, and Dean is frozen. He stood there, staring at the creature who is now feeding on the victim. John and Sam exchange looks. This is when the creature is vulnerable. They have to act.  
  
  
“Dean. Drop to the ground. Now!” Sam shouts at his brother. He watches in slow motion as Dean registers the words and slams his body down hard on the ground.   
  
  
Sam and John shoot the flare guns at the creature and watch as it is engulfed in flames. The flames are bright, lighting up the night sky. He takes a sneak peek at Dean who has his arms around his face. A quick glance at his Dad assures him the job is done, and Sam rushes over towards Dean and grabs his hands around Dean’s ankle. Sam pulls and drags his brother to safety, far away from the burning creature.  
  
  
  
  
  
Sam barely acknowledges his father leaving, too focused on wrapping his long arms around Dean’s shoulders and feels his brother trembling. His big brother, badass hunter, stubborn as shit, is trembling in his arms. The emotions come off him in waves, and only make Sam hold him tighter in his embrace.  
  
  
He rubs his hand up and down his brothers back, trying to calm Dean, trying to calm himself! What shocks him the most is the whimper Dean let’s escape his lips and the way he wraps his own arms around Sam as tight as he possibly can. Never letting go. Not in the near future anyway.  
  
  
It grounds Sam to suddenly understand that Dean is letting himself be vulnerable for Sam. Sam’s heart swells, the love for Dean getting stronger by the simple gesture of showing fear for the first time. Seeing Dean so open and emotional brings tears to his eyes. Part of Sam wants to break the tension, but he knows that there is a deeper reason for Dean to let go and not be called out on a chick-flick moment.  
  
  
Right now all Sam knows is Dean has realized he can let his emotions show, let it all go.  
  
  
 _Again, without the Winchester’s knowledge. Morpheus stands close by, watching the scene play out. The grin that plastered to his face as his brother fell to his death is still present. His passing will allow Morpheus the change to bring peace to the guilt laden, innocent victims.  
  
  
Watching the exchange between the young men brings hope to his heart, hope that he can change what Epiales has done. He knows that the older brother is coming to terms with his emotions, and that those emotions scare him to his very soul.  
  
  
Morpheus wants to give these men their wish. He will give the older man a dream. A dream he never thought was possible. And even though his dream is to have his brother in a more then brotherly way, they will find a way to make it work no matter what happens in the future._  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **Dean’s POV**  
  
  
Eventually Dean calms down enough to loosen up his grip to look at Sam. He expects to see derision, instead of the smile on Sam’s face makes him grin and relax completely in his little brother’s embrace.  
  
  
It’s over.  
  
  
The creature is gone and can’t hurt anyone else ever again – can never hurt his Sammy. His emotions overwhelm him, and Dean acts without thinking. Turning to his brother, Dean lands a kiss on Sam’s temple. It’s an intimate notion and chick-flick moment and it confuses him to no end. As soon as he realizes what he’s done, Dean pushes up on his feet, backing away even as Sam looks up with hurt etched on his face.  
  
  
As soon as Dean sees that look he stops. Instead he reaches forward and grabs Sam’s hand, pulling him to his feet. He waits for Sam to gain his balance before they head towards the Impala. Somehow their hands lock together: it’s the only gesture Dean can manage with the emotional charge racking his body.  
  
  
Dean has always loved Sam. He thought it was like a brother, and to realize that these are more than brotherly feelings? It’s a fucking shock to his system. And it scares him. Because what is there to be afraid of? If he’s honest, he’s always been afraid of what Sam would think.  
  
  
But the look of hurt on Sam’s face makes him rethink his thoughts on the subject. That maybe…Maybe Sam would be ok with these feelings?  
  
  
They arrive at the Impala and Dean heads to the passenger side. Sam tilts his head in surprise before grinning at his brother. Sam and Dean take their seats and drive in silence as they head to the motel for the night.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Dean shifts in the car and leans his head against the cold glass of the window. It feels good on his cheek and it helps him to stay calm. He peeks out of the corner of his eyes to gaze at Sam through his long lashes.  
  
  
There is heat upon his brother’s cheeks, and Dean can sense his relief to get far away from the scene as possible. And there is determination. Determination to prove he can take care of another person.   
  
  
This person being Dean. And Dean can admit that he wants that, wants Sam to watch over him.  
  
  
He smiles weakly and leans his head back as sleep takes over. Sam hums beside him to the purr of baby. The sigh of relief escaping his lips sets the tone for the ride back to the motel.  
  
  
 _Morpheus takes a joy ride in the back seat without ever being noticed by either brother. He beams at each young man, with pride in his heart. Out in the field, the older man accepted he had feelings, and that he deserves to express his emotions in a healthy positive way. With love and support from those around him.  
  
  
Morpheus wants these man to find their way together no matter the cost. The small laugh that escapes the younger man says it all: hope, love, devotion, and passion. The feelings he has for the other man are profound it could crush him. And here is where Morpheus can help.  
  
  
He will plant a small, pleasurable dream for the older man. A dream that will help him understand that the trouble they went through to achieve the knowledge that emotions are powerful was worth it. Morpheus wants to show the older brother that he is worth it, worth the dreams, and that those dreams should never be let go.   
  
  
Morpheus gently places his hand on Dean’s left shoulder and squeezes. This is the moment he induces the dream within his host. A thank you gift for saving others and his own self.  
  
  
It was all worth it to give a gift of hope to others that has been lost for some time._   
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
 **Sam’s POV**  
  
  
Sam watches his brother sleep in the car and smiles at the slight erotic noises coming from Dean. Dean slides further down his seat and his hands are by his sides. His fist clench and unclench as the sounds increase in volume. Sam blushes, because what is Dean dreaming about, and he laughs warmly at the thought. Will they finally be on the same page?  
  
  
They are about 15 minutes away from the motel when Dean moans, “Sammy.” His voice is raspy and low. Dean’s hips turn upwards to get relief, and Sam can see the bulge of Dean’s jeans. He gasps at the sight of his older brother in the midst of a sex dream: a sex dream about him. A flush covers Sam’s body at the mere speculation going on in his brother’s mind.   
  
  
Luck is with them and Sam pulls up into the space right in front of their room. Sam unbuckles his seatbelt and goes to do the same with Dean’s. He gets the belt off and then Sam can only sit back and watch the show. Dean seems to be at the end of his dream. He thrashes in the seat as his hips rise up and down looking for friction. His fist clench and unclench in unison. One last thrust of his hips Dean lets go and shouts, “Sammy.”  
  
  
Dean awakes with a jerk, and his eyes fly to Sam. Embarrassment is written clearly on Dean’s face and he quickly gets out of the car.  
  
  
Sam can’t wait to see what happens.  
  
  
~*~*~  
  
  
Sam takes a look at Dean and nods in the direction of the room. Dean avoids his gaze and rearranges his coat. Sam smiles to himself. The awkward, silence in the air makes him feel like he is on his first date, each person deciding who will take the next step and kiss.  
  
  
Sam’s breathing becomes rapid, as his body fills with anticipation for what is to come. He opens the door and heads inside. Turning on the light, Sam sits heavily on the bed and waits. Sam stares out the door, waiting on Dean to make a decision.   
  
  
He waits for what feels like eternity.  
  
  
Soon though, he hears unsure footsteps towards the door, followed by a barely there knock as Dean makes it over the threshold. He rubs the back of his neck, blinks his eyes rapidly, and bites his bottom lip. Dean seems younger in the doorway of the motel standing their hesitantly moving from one foot to the other.  
  
  
Then he stops moving and whispers, “Sammy,” Sam has to lean forward to make sure he heard what Dean said.  
  
  
Then Dean is in the room and has the door closed. Standing there with his hands in his pockets like a lost soul, not sure what to do next.  
  
  
His big, badass, womanizer, brother, is out of his element and embarrassed at wanting what he saw in his dreams. A dream that has shown Dean that he is worthy of having his dreams answered.  
  
  
Sam quickly stands and heads over to Dean before coming to a stop in front of him. Dean tenses as he approaches and is quick to drop his gaze towards the floor.   
  
  
Sam gently rests his hand on his brother’s shoulder and squeezes in reassurance. He notices the change in Dean’s breathing and how his frame shudders in this moment. While they have never been afraid to share things with each other, this may be too much, over the top, for either of them to deal with.  
  
  
Sam moves his hand slowly up to Dean’s cheek and feels the heat as it seeps into his palm. He stares at Dean the entire time, waiting until his brother looks up and they lock eyes with one another.  
  
  
The intensity of the emotions reflected in his brother’s eyes make Sam want to wrap his arms around Dean and never let him go. He wishes that Dean never put these brick walls up and buried his emotion from the start. But the fact he is letting Sam in now brings him hope.  
  
  
“Sammy?” Dean whispers. He is shaking.  
  
  
Sam knows what he has to do. “Dean, it’s okay. It’s okay to have these feelings. These dreams. I – I want you and I know you want me. Show me.” Sam tells Dean with as much reassurance and acceptance as he has.  
  
  
Dean’s neck and cheeks get even redder at the words. Sam grins that he can make his brother blush and be shy like a teenage girl. He will never be a girl, far from it, but pleased to know his brother isn’t hiding his feelings like he usually would.  
  
  
“Sam – Sammy. I – I do have these feelings. I – I – I think I always had feelings for you. I don’t know what to do. But then I had a dream. I – it was you and me. We were happy. Together.” He looks down and away, clearly gathering his thoughts, “I – I’ll try.”  
  
  
“Dean. It’s okay. I’ve always wanted more. And surprisingly, this hunt helped us see it.” Sam’s words are confident, even though he is nervous about his brother’s reaction.   
  
  
Sam notices Dean has his hands out of his pockets and is reaching for Sam’s coat pockets. Something to hold on to, he guesses. Sam can see the anxious look on Dean’s face, and he leans forward and their lips touch in a chaste kiss. Dean’s hands grip his brother’s coat pockets for leverage and to ground him.  
  
  
Sam breaks the chaste kiss and takes a breath as Dean pushes forward and claims Sam in a heated kiss. Sam wraps his arms around his shoulders and cards his fingers through Dean’s short hair. A soft moan escapes Dean’s throat and it vibrates against Sam’s mouth. A shiver passes through him at finally being able to taste his brother.  
  
  
Dean breaks the kiss by leaning his forehead against Sam’s. A small smile crosses his face when he hears Dean’s raspy voice call him, “Sammy.”  
  
  
It’s an answer to both of their dreams and prayers. Dean is finally taking what he wants and deserves in life, and it’s overwhelming for both of them. Sam put Dean in charge when he said show me, and he is quite fine with it.   
  
  
Until actually Sam pulls Dean in for a kiss full of hunger and need, and then there is teeth crashing and tongue clashing for dominance. Sam can’t be sure who wants it more, him or Dean, although Sam has the upper hand as Dean shivers and moans, leaning against his tall frame.  
  
  
Sam walks them back towards the door and they fall heavy against it. They break their kiss at the impact and suck in air before Dean can snake his hands around his brother’s waist to close the distance. Sam yelps in surprise before grinning wide at the eagerness inside of Dean.   
  
  
The need and want so powerful to and it’s being with Sam that makes it all that more meaningful.  
  
  
Dean grabs a fist full of his shirt and pulls Sam against his body before he attacks Sam’s mouth. Sam’s hands roam over his brother’s chest, shoulders, and arms. He can feel the flex of muscles beneath the soft flannel shirt and worn fitted denims.  
  
  
Sam’s hands move lower and lower until he reaches Dean’s ass. He palms the soft globes, before holding each cheek in his hands and then he  _squeezes_. Dean throws his head back and it cracks against the door behind him. He whimpers and moans in pure pleasure at Sam’s ministrations.  
  
  
He sucks at Dean’s collarbone, even as he lets his hands drift lower. Once Sam’s hands are in position he grabs Dean’s thighs and lefts him up the wall. Dean’s eyes go wide, a flush rises on his cheeks, even as he wraps his bowlegs around Sam’s waist. He holds on for dear life because this is getting serious.  
  
  
Dean sees Sam’s expression and hastens to reassure him. “Sammy. I’m okay. This – I never done this before. Please, Sam.” Dean tells him almost begging with want. A want Sam has never witnessed before in his brother. It’s nice to see for a change.  
  
  
“Dean. I know. It’s okay. I – I’ve never done this either. But I’ve got you.” Sam soothes Dean as he presses their bodies tight against the wall, supporting Dean with his body so he can release his hands. He grabs Dean’s face in his hands and locks their eyes. Sam uses this time to show Dean how much he cares, wants, needs, and loves his brother.  
  
  
Dean nods his head in agreement, smiles shyly and kisses him chastely in acknowledgement of what is happening between them.  
  
  
And that’s it for the innocence. Dean grinds his hips down against Sam and a deep, guttural moan escapes him. Sam is overwhelmed. The heat and love he feels for Dean is so strong he can’t stand it. Sam pulls Dean in for a heated kiss and easily gains dominance. He grins as he pushes his hips against Dean and feels him wiggling in pure ecstasy.  
  
  
Each time Sam grinds up, Dean pushes down, it’s a steady rhythm so they don’t lose their balance in their precarious position against the wall. Dean tongue fucks Sam to the speed of their thrusts as his breathing begins to speed up before Sam breaks the kiss, and places butterfly kisses along Dean’s jaw and neck working his way towards his collarbone.   
  
  
Their thrusts increase as they seek release, wanting to please each other in a manner that speaks volumes in the heat of passion. Dean begins to writhe and wriggle as a slight “O” forms his lips. Sam knows he’s close.  
  
  
Sam thrusts and pushes his hips as hard as he can against Dean and then Dean is coming and shouting, “Sammy – Sammy!”  
  
  
He grinds his hips against Dean to help him ride out his orgasm all the while pushing towards his own release. It overtakes him and then Sam is the one shouting, “Dean!” as he collapses against his brother.  
  
  
Sam leans against Dean and presses them tight to the wall to keep their balance. Now would not be a good time to fall. Resting his forehead on Dean’s, Sam gazes at Dean’s soft smile upon his lips before he kisses them softly.  
  
  
He needs to know what is going on in his brother’s head. Wants to know if this was enough for him to understand Sam’s love for him.   
  
  
“Dean? Dean, look at me. You okay? Are  _we_  okay? I want this with you Dean. I love you.” Sam whispers nervously, gazing into his brother’s eyes.  
  
  
“Sammy. Sammy, I’m okay. We – We are okay. I – I want this too, Sam. God help me I do. I – I – I love you.” Dean says. The vulnerability shining off his brother hits him in waves and radiates through his body.  
  
  
The feelings and emotions pouring out of Dean is beautiful. Sam can almost touch them. It’s a side of his brother he wants to see  _all_  the time. He wants Dean to know it is okay to have emotions and to express them to others without feeling out of place.  
  
  
He knows it’s a long road ahead, that it’s a journey they will be on for a life time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Notes:  
> This story is written for this year’s spn_j2_bigbang challenge. This is the second time I have participated in this challenge. 
> 
> I want to take the time to thank my wonderful artist, apocalipskiss, for the beautiful crafted black and white pieces of art! It captures the story beautifully and the boys connection perfectly. I am honored to have worked with apocalipskiss and to bring her prompt to life. Thank you for the prompt and letting me create a masterpiece for it. Leave some love for my artist <3
> 
> Thank you to my wonderful beta reader majestic_duxk for your offer to be my beta. Thank you for your kind words, encouragement, hand holding, and shoulder to lean on through this process. This story came together through the love, support, help, and guidance from you!! I owe this story to you, my dear, thank you again for helping me and being an amazing and wonderful friend!! Any remaining errors are my fault.
> 
> Thank you to caetylou for your offer to be my beta too. Thank you for your kind words, encouragement, and thoughts about my story. Thank you for your suggestions in re-wording my sentences and expanding in certain areas. Thank you for the suggestion on the book for emotions, I bought it and I’m waiting for it to come in the mail. I am honored to have met you and for all your support and help in making my story more cohesive. 
> 
> Thank you to my alpha reader deanshot for taking the time to read over my story and encourage me to keep going and pushing through until the end. For taking the time to support and offer advice over my fears, worries, and struggles of participating in the challenge.
> 
> I want to thank: skeletncloset – cillab42 – dragonflybeach – sylvanwitch – majestic_duxk – apocalipskiss – for helping me brainstorm ideas and thoughts I had for different scenes. It helped my process of where I wanted the characters to go. Thank you for being my cheerleaders!!
> 
> Thank you to wendy for letting me participate in her challenge on her community spn_j2_bigbang. Thank you for being a wonderful mod and doing all that you do behind the scenes to make this challenge a huge success every year!!!


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